](./images/smilies/eusa_wall.gif "Brick wall"){kind=small}
Hi everyone hope you are all well.I am 48 and was diagnosed in 2008, age 42 with a specific learning disability, non verbal dypraxic tendicies , with a pretty low IQ apparantly. I was assesed by a educational psychologists with the open university. i recieve a DSA award and have a home tutor while i am studying. i am still studying and have passed two exams, but just about, i have just about scraped a pass with my recent module, but still have the 3rd exam to contend with in June 2014. i really struggle and recieve employment support allowance and low rate DLA for anxiety(not dyspraxia). i am married with 3 children, two are adults and a 5 year old son, my husband is not working, he has worked as a valeter etc, but is now unemployed, as i claim the benefit, i did before i met him. he also has learning difficulties, he cannot read or write whatsoever, and is very frustrated by this. finding it hard to get employed.we both have had to suffer comments, the looks and sarcastic comments say it all from people. I am now on a work programme being forced into work,i told my adviser about dyspraxia, he didn't even know what it was, he just said we need to get you into work, i am really worried, as they have put in for a care job with driving,(it took me ten years on and of with 7 different instructers, all lost there rag with me except the last one, and then passed) however i did have a minor accident 6 months later, and havn't drove sine. year and half later, i am nervous on the road and don't want to drive anymore. i have memory loss, i lose everything, i put something(bank card, money etc,) in the most simpliest of places and forget straight away where i have put it, looking and getting frustrated, and stressed, upset, i have even thrown money in the bin,£60.my concentration is poor and forget appointments, poor budgeting skills and heavily in debt, i feel exsausted and usally in bed by ten, people say to me you havn't done nothing, i can't help feeling tired and fatigued. I am a walk over and just say yes for an easy life, feeling frustrated later and angry.i have suffered with anxiety all my life, was bullied all my life in school, and people tend to take advantage of me, i can't take critism and get offended easlily, and tend to get angry, i have had people say to me you are studying and hoping to work, so you should be working now, i am taking on to much, i am studying to exercise my brain, and i struggle, it feels like i have climbed a mountain after doing an essay, i have no more than 50/100 for an assighnment, i never understand the question, the main area i am worried about is the work, i want to work, but am worried, about feeling fatiged, memory, concentration. sorry for the long essay ha ha, but feel like i am banging my head agaisnt a brick wall,i want someone to listen.
