Very recently diagnosed,I am 48.

Getting assessed for your dyspraxia, getting help, disability allowance etc.

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New member - welcome them!
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Joined: Sat May 01, 2021 8:30 pm

Very recently diagnosed,I am 48.

Post by Cailte50 »

I am finding the diagnosis shocking but I am not surprised either.I looked to be assessed,privately,,as I have struggled,all my life doing basic things or learning new things(I get there eventually) and it was when I was considering learning to drive,for the umpteen time,that I realised I needed to know for certain.

Have other people struggled with the news of a positive diagnosis,even though they already knew? Part of my problem is that I have been asked not to tell my sibling(he has a new baby),and my mother doesnt want to talk about it at all.My husband doesn't know how to react and was certain I would be told I have anxiety. So I feel very alone with this knowledge.

I am not based in the UK and services and groups are all geared towards kids and young adults in my country.That is why I was delighted to find this forum.
Tom fod
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Joined: Thu May 12, 2011 9:05 pm
Location: SW UK

Re: Very recently diagnosed,I am 48.

Post by Tom fod »

Hi there and welcome. Glad you've found us and I really hope the Forum will help you feel less alone.

It does take time to process the realisation/news and sometimes other people can have more or as much of a 'problem' with it than we do. Added to that, is the difficulty/fear of "What should I say?" and "How might they react?" I think as a community, we probably need to try to normalise disclosure since it will in turn help improve awareness. Being Dyspraxic goes beyond being a bit clumsy and there is an emotional impact of our struggles which so often causes us a good deal of associated anxiety though not all of will want or necessarily need to seek help for, or will actually receive a formal diagnosis of generalised anxiety or other diagnosis associated with emotional or psychological well being.

It's not your mother's place to tell you who you can or cannot inform, though I appreciate she may see the news from a somewhat unenlightened perspective. It's not a terminal illness, nor is it really her fault for not badgering your teachers enough (if you struggled significantly at school) as awareness in education is not as good as it could be and generally if they believe children will muddle through they will often not intervene. I think the aim is to get us through school with hopefully good exam results as the myth that we'd grow out of it persisted.

While we may get better at adapting as we become older and more experienced, the Dyspraxia doesn't go away, it may be come less relevant as we develop coping strategies. Sometimes the pace of change and/or level of stress in our lives renders these coping strategies obsolete and we struggle to find new ones/adapt those we have to make them fit for purpose. Things like loss of a job and/or a new manager or colleagues who we decide we're the odd one out can precipitate problems and there are too many who have suffered nervous breakdowns as a result.

Do check out the Help Resources list in this section above. Sites such as the Dyspraxic Doctor's have useful info and there are 15 years of posts here, you can search. If you have any further questions or concerns, please don't be afraid to ask

With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)
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