New Here - Introduction

[St31nY]

Hi there. I’m new here; and joining because I am coming to realize how deeply rooted dispraxia is in who I am. As a child I was diagnosed with Dispraxia, I got treatment when I was a kid and largely overcame handwriting.

Still to this day, I’m not exceptionally coordinated. I’ve never been athletically gifted, I’m not an exceptional driver, and so on. But I’ve made due and moved on. This year I’m 30, and i can proudly say I’ve been largely successful in life. Ive done my best to forget my dispraxia and to convince myself it is no longer a factor. I’m not sure the details are important, but I started to be unable to ignore the signs following a major lifestyle change, and a related personal hardship.

Sparing the details I’m talking to a therapist and a psychiatrist both. I’ve made progress but it’s clear the effects are not just limited to childhood writing, and at a minimum I have some form on non hyperactive ADHD. I had no clue these could be related until the Doctor explained it to me at 29, and in retrospect I can’t imagine how I didn’t realize it sooner. My unwillingness to admit there was a problem has destroyed past relationships, and strained relationships with my parents and past Roomate’s. It’s held me back in how I approach social situations. As I’ve seen my life impacted while refusing to admit I still have my childhood diagnosis, I have become increasingly anxious spending more and more of my life not understanding what I’m doing wrong but trying to fix it. Now I’m finally making headway seeing great progress with therapy, but have more work to do. My refusal to accept my dispraxia diagnosis in some ways made me strong enough to succeed in spite of it but ultimately it has nearly ruined me. I haven’t read much on this forum yet, but I hope it’s another step in the right direction to hear from others who I hope can share experiences and perspective.

[Xenavire]

Hello, and welcome.

Denial is common, but as you have learned, isn't healthy. The same is pretty much universally true - being in denial about being an alcoholic is destructive as well, and I'm sure I could list a bunch more.

You have started to accept that you are different - and what people think of different is usually negative. Yes, there are negative aspects to Dyspraxia, but because you are accepting that you have difficulties, you can get and share advice on how to adapt and minimise those difficulties. After all, there is a famous bit of wisdom - "Forewarned is forearmed", meaning that knowing and accepting what you have and who you are because of it, let's you face it and fight back.

Motor control difficulties? Occupational therapy can help. Speech issues, speech therapy. Poor sense of time, use more alarms. Knowledge is important, and will make your life easier.

There are good aspects too - we think a little differently. That means we may see solutions or opportunities that other people may not. They aren't all winners, mind you.

I hope this step helps you get your life into a place that you are happy with it.

[St31nY]

One thing I haven’t seen mentioned is something I actually consider a strength, and I’m curious if others with dispraxia share it. When presented with a problem I need to overcome, I am quite good at focusing the whole of my efforts to the task. In University, I pursued a fairly advanced dual engineering degree, and I did it in 3 years often taking 25-50% more corseload than my peers. When it came to finals, my entire focus was poured into studying, often at the expense of everything else. I might go a day or two without remembering to eat, and it was common for me to lose 5 lbs over the week. But I loved it and I thrived. When I started working, I was presented with covering 24/7 operations as on call support, and occasional on site support. I thrived at this too. But in family life, it’s not practical to drop everything else one is responsible for, so I’ve made a lot of efforts to tempering this trait. I’m not sure if it is Dispraxia or just a survival instinct but really interested to hear from others.

[Tom fod]

Dyspraxia does not define our whole and while we may struggle to engage and grasp some things some of the time, we can be very tenacious and see things from a different angle making our approach to problem very effective/even legendary. However, we can be prone to burnout as we are apt to pursuing our goals in a most unsustainable way.

I liken it to having a pesky mischievious Goblin alter-ego. He likes nothing more than throwing spanners into the works of my plans. Mostly I can outwit him with meticulous planning, humour, patience and good grace, but other times he gets lucky and gains the upper hand and reminds me he is definitely still there. That's when I want to strangle the little %&*ker!

[Xenavire]

I like the goblin analogy. It's like that episode of the twilight zone with the creature on the wing - except we were born with it and have ways to slow it down. That's a really fun way to phrase it and capture how it feels when we have really bad days.

[St31nY]

Excellent perspective and analogy. Thanks for sharing.