Gave up on life

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Tam1
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Gave up on life

Post by Tam1 »

Does anyon else feel like what’s the point in life I got paid of my work 3 months ago I don’t know if it the dyspraxia but I just don’t want to do anything any more I just want to sleep am fed up of proving to people am not stupid and not lazy
Tom fod
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Re: Gave up on life

Post by Tom fod »

Welcome

I think everyone one here has had a point where they think why should I bother it's pointless anyway.

So what job were you in that you got paid off of?
Tom
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With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)
Bay
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Re: Gave up on life

Post by Bay »

It's saddeningly familiar. I've got a job now for a little over a year, but my boss just snapped because I suggested an improvement to our system to the IT manager of the company and he thought it was a good idea to implement.. I've been put on notice that I have to follow the hierarchical lines so suggestions have to go trough my boss first. I had a job as IT support manager before, and I kind of blurted the idea out in conversation not thinking anything of it, so now I feel I can't talk to my collegues about anything anymore. And my boss is too pre-occupied to understand any arguments I bring to them and when I diplomaticly point out mistakes they make (as in "I don't understand why you say this because then that doesn't seem to work") they snivel that it's too complicated for me to understand and I just have to do my job. As I'm not allowed to take strategic or tactical decisions and my boss now micromanages me, my coping mechanisms don't work and I can't do what I'm good at, they now only let me do repetitive administrative tasks that I'm too slow for. For the good of the company, I feel like they should kick me out and hire three uneducated workers for the same wage as me alone, they'll do 6 times as much work than I do for the same cost. Given my previous career (never held on to a job for more than two years), this job is kind of my last resort though so I just try to get trough the day hoping my boss gets promoted away or something, and I try to find meaning and things that interest me when I'm at home. Even though I hardly have the energy left when I get home from work. Plan B is to play the lottery and hope to win. One in a billion chance is better than nothing right? XD Those are the sucky days ... On the other hand I've had worse prospects and managed to get to a better place before ... So just hang in there, things may get better.
SwervingCentaur
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Re: Gave up on life

Post by SwervingCentaur »

Every day. I've felt like this since I was sixteen. I've had over ten jobs, never spent more than a year at them. I failed in school, college and everything else.
Tom fod
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Re: Gave up on life

Post by Tom fod »

Bay wrote: Fri Feb 01, 2019 2:47 am It's saddeningly familiar. I've got a job now for a little over a year, but my boss just snapped because I suggested an improvement to our system to the IT manager of the company and he thought it was a good idea to implement.. I've been put on notice that I have to follow the hierarchical lines so suggestions have to go trough my boss first. I had a job as IT support manager before, and I kind of blurted the idea out in conversation not thinking anything of it, so now I feel I can't talk to my collegues about anything anymore. And my boss is too pre-occupied to understand any arguments I bring to them and when I diplomaticly point out mistakes they make (as in "I don't understand why you say this because then that doesn't seem to work") they snivel that it's too complicated for me to understand and I just have to do my job. As I'm not allowed to take strategic or tactical decisions and my boss now micromanages me, my coping mechanisms don't work and I can't do what I'm good at, they now only let me do repetitive administrative tasks that I'm too slow for. For the good of the company, I feel like they should kick me out and hire three uneducated workers for the same wage as me alone, they'll do 6 times as much work than I do for the same cost. Given my previous career (never held on to a job for more than two years), this job is kind of my last resort though so I just try to get trough the day hoping my boss gets promoted away or something, and I try to find meaning and things that interest me when I'm at home. Even though I hardly have the energy left when I get home from work. Plan B is to play the lottery and hope to win. One in a billion chance is better than nothing right? XD Those are the sucky days ... On the other hand I've had worse prospects and managed to get to a better place before ... So just hang in there, things may get better.
Sounds like a rubbish place to work if you aren't allowed sufficient autonomy to take the initiative. Isn't your colleague who implemented your suggestion the one who should be more in trouble? Could he not have said "Boss Bay has suggested doing X, I think's a sensible idea. are you content that I implement it.

It's a pain having Dyspraxia as it too often means we struggle to inspire confidence. I think it is very important for us to be able to see the contribution we're making to help build our confidence in ourselves.That said the turning the handle stuff is important and bosses need to be better at recognising the value of that being done well to ensure situational awareness and inform the making of correct decisions etc.
Tom
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With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)
Tam1
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Re: Gave up on life

Post by Tam1 »

Tom fod wrote: Thu Jan 31, 2019 6:12 pm Welcome

I think everyone one here has had a point where they think why should I bother it's pointless anyway.

So what job were you in that you got paid off of?
I was working for a landscape company but they have went bust
Tam1
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Re: Gave up on life

Post by Tam1 »

SwervingCentaur wrote: Fri Feb 01, 2019 4:18 pm Every day. I've felt like this since I was sixteen. I've had over ten jobs, never spent more than a year at them. I failed in school, college and everything else.
I’ve felt like this since I was 13 and am now 26 sometimes wish I could just sleep all the time
Tom fod
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Re: Gave up on life

Post by Tom fod »

Tam1 wrote: Tue Feb 05, 2019 1:10 am I was working for a landscape company but they have went bust
My first employer sadly went under too. It wasn't easy at the time but having had some previous work helped me in finding another more stable employer. It is so demotivating especially when you seem to fail to get anywhere in all that you apply for. It is difficult but you have to keep on keeping on.
Tom
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With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)
Pollygale69
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Re: Gave up on life

Post by Pollygale69 »

I often feel like "what's the point". I feel like I have been so misunderstood most of my life. I have just been diagnosed with Dysbraxia and until now have put my fatigue and brain fog down to chronic illness, depression and anxiety. Maybe it is a mixture of all, who know's? I have felt different my whole life, never felt like I fit in anywhere. In my own world as so to speak. It's hard to keep going when living in a world that is so alien to you. But I have a right to be here and deserve to be as happy as anyone else, as do you. Somehow I manage to find my own way around things. Some days I don't get very far mind lol. Things are certainly getting harder as I get older though. Just seem to run out of steam so quickly. I think the key is to move at your own pace and have faith that all will be well.
Tom fod
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Re: Gave up on life

Post by Tom fod »

Pollygale69 wrote: Fri Sep 13, 2019 10:28 am I often feel like "what's the point". I feel like I have been so misunderstood most of my life. I have just been diagnosed with Dysbraxia [Dyspraxia ] and until now have put my fatigue and brain fog down to chronic illness, depression and anxiety. Maybe it is a mixture of all, who know's?

I have felt different my whole life, never felt like I fit in anywhere. In my own world as so to speak. It's hard to keep going when living in a world that is so alien to you. But I have a right to be here and deserve to be as happy as anyone else, as do you. Somehow I manage to find my own way around things. Some days I don't get very far mind lol. Things are certainly getting harder as I get older though. Just seem to run out of steam so quickly. I think the key is to move at your own pace and have faith that all will be well.
Hi Polly and welcome.

Anxiety and Depression do seem to affect a fair few living with Dyspraxia. I've found the difficulty in putting my plans into action has often caused me to hate myself. We're rarely unintelligent but society seems to treat those with a disability or difference as lacking in intelligence. The frustrations Dyspraxia causes us and our natural reactions can reinforce this notion and it becomes a downward spiral.
Tom
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With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)
Xenavire
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Re: Gave up on life

Post by Xenavire »

Like many others here, I spent a time dealing with depression. Something that helped me was advice from my therapist - he told me that I should always assess the intelligence of the people around me. Not for malicious reasons, of course, but rather to put into perspective the things they do or say, so that I could look at someone acting out and think to myself "No, this behaviour doesn't surprise me coming from someone so stupid/intelligent."

You can branch this thinking out over time, and in doing so, detach yourself just enough that other people aren't making things harder for you.

This obviously isn't a solution, but any trick to lighten the emotional load can certainly help, and it shouldn't need to be said, but not every person has the mindset required for this trick. In my eyes, the biggest step is reaching out and getting hold of a therapist if possible. We may largely need to deal with Dyspraxia alone, but battling depression shouldn't be a solo act.
Tom fod
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Re: Gave up on life

Post by Tom fod »

Xenavire wrote: Sun Sep 15, 2019 5:33 pm Like many others here, I spent a time dealing with depression. Something that helped me was advice from my therapist - he told me that I should always assess the intelligence of the people around me. Not for malicious reasons, of course, but rather to put into perspective the things they do or say, so that I could look at someone acting out and think to myself "No, this behaviour doesn't surprise me coming from someone so stupid/intelligent."

You can branch this thinking out over time, and in doing so, detach yourself just enough that other people aren't making things harder for you.

This obviously isn't a solution, but any trick to lighten the emotional load can certainly help, and it shouldn't need to be said, but not every person has the mindset required for this trick. In my eyes, the biggest step is reaching out and getting hold of a therapist if possible. We may largely need to deal with Dyspraxia alone, but battling depression shouldn't be a solo act.

You can also extend this to think about what might have motivated to say what they did.
They will have a different and often limited perspective so it is OK to disregard after due consideration of their motives.
Tom
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With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)
texilulu
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Re: Gave up on life

Post by texilulu »

Xenavire wrote: Sun Sep 15, 2019 5:33 pm Like many others here, I spent a time dealing with depression. Something that helped me was advice from my therapist - he told me that I should always assess the intelligence of the people around me. Not for malicious reasons, of course, but rather to put into perspective the things they do or say, so that I could look at someone acting out and think to myself "No, this behaviour doesn't surprise me coming from someone so stupid/intelligent."

You can branch this thinking out over time, and in doing so, detach yourself just enough that other people aren't making things harder for you.

This obviously isn't a solution, but any trick to lighten the emotional load can certainly help, and it shouldn't need to be said, but not every person has the mindset required for this trick. In my eyes, the biggest step is reaching out and getting hold of a therapist if possible. We may largely need to deal with Dyspraxia alone, but battling depression shouldn't be a solo act.
I also struggle with this, but your comments are helpful here - look at the person making that comment. I'm quite successful in my career, and have worked for companies for 2, 8, 5 years at a time. Over time I've learned to separate what I do at work from what I do for myself at home. I do what is expected at work these days, and save the extraordinary ideas for my own work at home. Once I had a job where I was given free reign to my ideas, and ended up outperforming and showing up all my colleagues because I just lived to work and they let me. Then my boss got me transferred because it was starting to show him up and would have been too obvious if he tried to take the credit. I ended up taking a redundancy from where they transferred me to... So now I just 'tow the line' and give them the level they expect. It makes me depressed sometimes to do this - especially as I'm in a creative field and can see the sky is the limit and they are basically limiting me... but then I think, Hey! they are paying me a lot of money, and I will retire early hopefully and then I can work for myself and do what I want.
Have a lovely day my friends. x
Lilz113
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Re: Gave up on life

Post by Lilz113 »

I gave up on big corporate companies years ago. I'd constantly get snarky comments at team meetings because I was always tired and struggling (always focused during the meeting but coming into work id be slumped on my desk and each lunchtime i was having to take a nap just to get through the day) They also constantly changed the goalposts every few months with targets etc. Everytime id get near the top suddenly everything is changed round or they were berating me for taking longer in the exchange to pack my things up at end of day or tying my shoelaces. I just got sick of it and was lucky enough my mate runs a small business i now work in. Not a great job or anything but pays the basic bills and i have a slightly longer shift where i have more breaks in between to try and combat brain fog and fatigue long enough to get the job done
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