Becoming an Adult & Separating from your Parents

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swan crow
New member - welcome them!
Posts: 4
Joined: Mon Jan 03, 2022 9:02 am

Becoming an Adult & Separating from your Parents

Post by swan crow »

Things take me a lot longer than your average person;
I am 33 this year, and I moved out a year and four months ago to university to do my first BA. It is a fact that I have struggled to become an adult and be alone.
Occasionally there is a certain terrifying feeling that comes With being alone too, which would usually make me run to a The toxic relationship that ends up destroying everything around me.It's a pattern I think.

hAs anybody else carried a similar experience of becoming an adult and separating from their parents. Or have any tips, or slogans or thought models to try out?

It would be very much appreciated


Swan Crow
Tom fod
Posts: 2645
Joined: Thu May 12, 2011 9:05 pm
Location: SW UK

Re: Becoming an Adult & Separating from your Parents

Post by Tom fod »

I didn't move out until I was 37. Probably could and should have done it sooner in hindsight. Adulting can be scary.

Low self esteem doesn't help. Sorry can't really offer anything useful on the relationships front.

With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)
Posts: 919
Joined: Sat Jan 06, 2007 10:24 am
Location: Bridgend, South Wales

Re: Becoming an Adult & Separating from your Parents

Post by Shadwell »

I personally done it when I was 18 as such living in halls of residence, then as soon as I finished my course I went back home for a month, before things got extremely heated and words said that shouldn't from a parent to a son/daughter. and not taking no as an answer. so left me little/no choice in the matter.

I then moved in with 3 other lads, and we got on like a house on fire for the first 5 months, and had the best time, and as limited on fridge and freezer space, then we taken it in turns on the shopping and eating together which then meant we didn't need to take up the extra space in the fridge, apart from buying things like milk etc each.

then after 6 months, I got a car and moved to haverfordwest for 6 months, that didn't fair so well, as the company I had, and my best friend needed me around. so I moved back to my home town.

then had a flat, but that was costing a bomb as electric heaters, and way too far out of the way of anything.

then moved to another place for about 3 years, but that was just another bedroom with a sink.

then moved back to the house I first moved into, and had a right bunch of people that should have lived in secured accomodation at her majesty's pleassure. so things like Police kicking doors in at stupid o'clock on a Saturday or Sunday morning. then had a group that wasn't so bad, and they stayed around until all offered flats. my turn never seemed to arrive until 2007.

then got a place above a neighbour with Psychosis, to be honnest no-one should be around someone like that. I was finally transfered in a flat swap back in 2010. felt sorry for the couple quite literally as then the neighbour held a tennant support worker hostage. that got them their move about 6 months later.

but been living in my current place since October 2010, yes has it's ups, and downs, but overall it isn't too bad, wake up when I want, go to bed when I want, do what I want. but having tinnitus, then getting to sleep is really hard ontop of my brain in constant overdrive.
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