Does anybody relate?

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sion-praxic
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Joined: Fri Mar 27, 2020 1:10 pm

Does anybody relate?

Post by sion-praxic »

Hello my name is Sion
~~~ I have dyspraxia ~~~ only recently became aware as an adult.
I find it hard to deal with numerous pressures in my life with the added layer of needing to prove moment for moment that I have a learning difficulty and I'm not hiding something, lying or being rude.
Does anybody relate? How do you work around this? Thanks X
Tom fod
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Location: SW UK

Re: Does anybody relate?

Post by Tom fod »

sion-praxic wrote: Fri Mar 27, 2020 1:24 pm Hello my name is Sion
~~~ I have dyspraxia ~~~ only recently became aware as an adult.
I find it hard to deal with numerous pressures in my life with the added layer of needing to prove moment for moment that I have a learning difficulty and I'm not hiding something, lying or being rude.
Does anybody relate? How do you work around this? Thanks X
Hi Sion and welcome

I can definitely relate. I think too often certain people incorrectly read our being hesitant as something else. Equally being a bit disorganised brings out some peoples' impatience if they don't feel we're giving them the level of attention they think they're due. I worry I don't sound/appear competent and that too can make things worse.

As for strategies, I've long been very perfectionist and demanded impossibly high standards of myself to prevent/mitigate others' finding fault. Regrettably it's not sustainable and fortunately I'm a bit better at being kinder to/more forgiving of myself now. Sometimes you have to be ceaselessly polite and ask them to repeat/re explain what they want/need more clearly.

Hope this helps.
Tom
Moderator/Administrator

With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)
sion-praxic
New member - welcome them!
Posts: 2
Joined: Fri Mar 27, 2020 1:10 pm

Re: Does anybody relate?

Post by sion-praxic »

Thanks Tom It can seem a little like a game of - I have dyspraxia.. no really I have dyspraxia - I don't feel like I've ever said I have dyspraxia so many times in a week - it can be quite upsetting wondering if that need'll ever go away. I found what you said relatable particularly about "the dyspraxic" demeanour not being a perceived level of attention a person feels they're due. I for one am quite attentive but have difficulty in showing it as I mull around in my thoughts.
What do you think? Thx again :ball:
Tom fod
Administrator
Posts: 2947
Joined: Thu May 12, 2011 9:05 pm
Location: SW UK

Re: Does anybody relate?

Post by Tom fod »

Hi again Sion

Recognition and understanding regrettably still have a long way to go. Added to that it's a difficult thing to explain and trying to explain ourselves is typically something it seems to affect. It's difficult to have confidence in ourselves and project this, explaining to others that we just need a bit more time and patience.

It tends to give us a lot of associated anxiety and worry. We overthink what we want to say, how to say it and when then too often blurt it or mumble so we have to repeat ourselves. Many of us care deeply so over-analyse and worry about what we've said and how whoever will interpret it and what they will think of us. Processing these thoughts so often leads to a heightened level of nervous anxiety and difficulty switching off to relax or sleep. Some people regrettably choose to see it as us lazily daydreaming.

I've taken to humourously characterising my dyspraxia as being like living with a mischievous and troublesome goblin alter-ego. The little blighter likes nothing more than throwing spanners into the works of my plans. Some of the time I succeed in outwitting him with humour and good grace. Other times I want to strangle the little twat.

Before I learned about it around 10 years ago now. I was unhappy and often impatient with myself and that's when I first stumbled upon this forum. I was really worried about who to tell, how to tell them and what they'd think. A trusted friend of mine asked what the 'new label' changed about me.

Hope this helps in some measure. If you haven't seen them already t's worth looking at the links
http://www.dyspraxicadults.org.uk/forum ... =13&t=7385
Tom
Moderator/Administrator

With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)
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