Communication misunderstanding

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Bron69Rallt
New member - welcome them!
Posts: 1
Joined: Sun Jul 14, 2019 8:22 pm

Communication misunderstanding

Post by Bron69Rallt »

I am in a relationship with a wonderful woman who has dyspraxia. I am truly in love with her. We get on really well but for a while now she has been treating me bad and manipulating me.

I couldn't really see it until my family had to sit me down and have a word with me.

She uses things against me, makes plans with her friends when she knows we are doing something that day then doesn't even see what the problems is, she blames he dyspraxia for everything. She demands things, doesn't ask nicely, assumes that we can do what she wants.

She has been in an abusive relationship in the past and I feel that is how she is treating me, like emotionally manipulating by saying things and then I'm supposed to just believe it's her dyspraxia.

Now I know that Dyspraxia is a co ordinating condition so how does that excuse how she has been treating me. She claims that all this is down to her dyspraxia.

Please can someone explain this to me

Thank you and no offence meant to be in this post, j just want to understand.
Tom fod
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Posts: 2946
Joined: Thu May 12, 2011 9:05 pm
Location: SW UK

Re: Communication misunderstanding

Post by Tom fod »

This is potentially a bit of a poisoned chalice :evilb: However I love digging a hole for myself!

It's a difficult one and perhaps she is struggling to process being treated badly by her ex(es) and others and is being controlling as a defensive mechanism? Do you think she feels she has to stick with her friends because she fears you will eventually see her as the bad person she feels she is and you then ditch her? Dyspraxia can really hurt ones self-esteem and sometimes people resort to habitual self-destructive behaviours. I don't think it is fair of her to use her dyspraxia as an excuse. How would she react if you suggested she consider counselling?

Bron69Rallt wrote: Wed Jul 31, 2019 9:18 am I am in a relationship with a wonderful woman who has dyspraxia. I am truly in love with her. We get on really well but for a while now she has been treating me bad and manipulating me.

I couldn't really see it until my family had to sit me down and have a word with me.

She uses things against me, makes plans with her friends when she knows we are doing something that day then doesn't even see what the problems is, she blames he dyspraxia for everything. She demands things, doesn't ask nicely, assumes that we can do what she wants.

She has been in an abusive relationship in the past and I feel that is how she is treating me, like emotionally manipulating by saying things and then I'm supposed to just believe it's her dyspraxia.

Now I know that Dyspraxia is a co ordinating condition so how does that excuse how she has been treating me. She claims that all this is down to her dyspraxia.

Please can someone explain this to me

Thank you and no offence meant to be in this post, j just want to understand.
Tom
Moderator/Administrator

With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)
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