Single Dyspraxic trying to find love

[FAndrews]

Hi I'm Felix i'm 27 from somerset and i have been dealing with Dyspraxia (though I'm a little unusual in that right handed, artistic but still mentally a bit odd and clumsy and a tad sensitive) for my whole life and it seems to be keeping me back with relationships and getting out of this eternally single phase (never been in a proper relationship). I'm currently trying online dating, but having not much luck at all, i don't seem to get any responses or interests, and had some very short conversations.
this is hitting my self esteem pretty hard at the moment and is endlessly frustrating (makes me think is there something wrong with me? am i doing this wrong and why does this seem so easy to other people!). can anyone off any advice? any feedback from people going through a similar situation would be helpful to. just be nice to talk about this



P.S This is also very rare for me, as i don't often tell people or say to anyone except family about my condition, hate the idea of my friends and colleagues thinking about or treating me differently for having it, i just want to fit it, not just feel like I'm on the outside looking in

[Jim]

Yeah it's hard isn't it?

I'd actually be quite pleased to have any kind of coversation going via these online dating things but all I get is diddly squat.

Makes me wonder if I actually exist sometimes.

[FAndrews]

yep sure is no responses, just ignore my messages not even bother to answer. kinda makes me wonder if there is something wrong with because of the way I'm constantly ignored , just want a chance at love, is that so hard? but as they say:

'in order to succeed one must try'

doesn't help when it is just constant failure

[Tom fod]

Hi Felix

I know the feeling too.

I'm on Match.Com at present and struggling to get anywhere really. It seems people are looking at my profile but often they're miles away and I don't drive. I should probably be more proactive but the response rate so far has been abysmal.

I find that knowing what to say is often my first barrier and the one that always seems to trip me up n leave me feeling lonely and losing hope.

As for declaring my dyspraxia I find that difficult too because most people are Dyspraxia? what's that? Only a minority are judgemental but that's their problem so I try not to let that upset me, though it invariably does.

Keep plugging away.

[Jim]

Match.com is also pretty expensive to use, I gave that site up long ago because there is point spending lots of money and maximum effort on zero return.

[FAndrews]

don't get me started on though didn't fork any money, just saw the prices, thought screw that and ran away; currently on PlentyofFish (must be using the wrong bait or something ) and Zoosk

[Shadwell]

it is like most if not 95% of these web-site dating things are a load of (sorry cannot continue with that!!). but yeah I know my friend said he was single when he was still living with his ex. and changed his surname, so makes you wonder how many people are genuine.

like you I seen the price of Match.com, and said **** that. especially when they said £££ to join, and then ££ per month, or something. I really said no chance then.

but yeah trying to find something to talk about is very hard, and kind of makes for the awkward silence, and then the awkward silence is even harder to break because you think about the awkward silence.

[FAndrews]

yeah, online dating is awkward but I'm getting better with practice, can be kind of frustrating finding a great girl and then trying to figure out what to write. i avoid match.com and am currently trying Plentyoffish and Okcupid.com, why are all the ones who like me so far away! but it is so tricky meeting someone these days.

[Tom fod]

Match has definitely deteriorated. I tried it in the past probably 6 yrs or go or so and it was much less commercialised then.

I paid c£78 for six months which works out at £13 a month. What annoys me most apart from the v few responses I get is the fact that I get loads of emails about add ons for the same money again. Match Affinity, seeing if someone has read your message, 'out of office' all these things and more are extra! grrr

Think sometimes you have to appreciate people might not reply as they're talking to someone else. or at least that's what I tell myself.

[Jim]

It's just a lot of money to spend for basically nothing.. It's very little different to gambling in that respect. I think these dating sites ought to be regulated, because it's too easy to take advantage of people's vulnerabilities.

[Tom fod]

Very much agree with that!

You need to be a bit suspicious as there are some seriously unscrupulous types committing romance frauds. If it seems too good to be true, beware!

[FAndrews]

Thanks for the warning! i don't like how nobody ever responds to my messages just seems bad manners in my opinions.