Dyspraxic Adults

What sort of things do you struggle with?

I'm a bit less exacting and not as much my own harshest critic as I used to be.

I strive for a degree of perfection but better at knowing when that may not be possible.

I can follow a recipe but not a massive fan of multi-componnent meals where you need to have everything planned to be ready at more or less the same time (meat n veg)

Not a great fan of fiddly things

Wish my home was less cluttered and untidy.

Not always a fan that I'll too often take the most awkward and least efficient approach for what I need to get done then wish I'd done it better way. Suppose I'm a frustrated perfectionist.

I personally use the term challenges rather than symptoms as latter is too overly pathologising for my personal liking.

Symptoms is still a valid term but like disorder I'm not a fan. Some would say I'm in denial.

I liken it to living with a mischievous goblin alter-ego. We have an uneasy truce. He likes to throw spanners into the workings of my plans. Some of the time I manage to stay just ahead of him and outwit him with humour, patience and good grace. Other times I just want to strangle the blighter!

For me the classic childhood challenges included:
unable to tie shoestrings (until the very last day of Kindergarten. Since then it's been a struggle. I miss velcro)
could not ride a bike until age 10.
I was the worst player on the worst baseball team in little league.

Speech
Had to attend speech therapy from 3rd to 5th grade. They called it 'lazy tongue' back then. That was a confidence booster LOL.
I was very loud - unable to modulate my voice for volume.
Terrible singer - I lack the ability to have any control over singing.
speaking voice - same thing; I run flat/monotone; mumble words when tired.

Taste
Super finicky/picky eater from day one. As an infant if the food wasnt covered in chocolate pudding I didnt want it
certain food flavors are way too intense. I have no idea how anyone can eat Bananas. The consistency and flavor is nasty to me. I haven't eat the most basic food items from cottage cheese, pineapple, Mac & cheese, etc. Cooked/boiled vegetables I cannot eat. the texture of most foods creep me out.

Smell
Certain smells overwhelm me. I have to put a towel at the foot of my bedroom door if anyone cooks flavor intense foods. It's easier for me to let them cook their food and I'll manage my own issues.

Eyesight
I have amazing eyesight (Im 50 and wear reading glasses only for ease)
but spatial awareness & map reading etc I score myself super low. I get lost a lot while driving and add in extra time.
I dont use GPS for fear it'll cause me to have accidents
**I didnt even want to learn how to drive until 18.

Fine Motor Skills (for these I have gotten better at age - but still struggle from time to time.)
buttoning a shirt took at least two attempts. I always had one more button at the top and an extra loop at the bottom
putting on a belt - I would miss a loop all the time; not even realizing it.
Zippers on jackets - those things are a menace. I jammed them up all the time.
tying a tie - I couldn't do it until early 20s. And I couldn't do it by watching myself in a mirror. I nearly failed Cub Scouts due to my lack of knot tying skills
Penmanship - my handwriting is atrocious; especially cursive. I quit cursive by 12th grade. No teacher ever scolded me for that.
Shop class - I was a solid D student. I cannot draw the same thing twice - meaning I could never be a cartoonist.

Personal Hygiene
By hair is very wavy/curly/tangly if I grow it long. And In the 1970s/1980s we all did. My hair looked like a rat's nest. I couldn't comb my hair at all. I wish I had kept it short & tight as I do now.
Dental hygiene - also terrbile. I cant floss due to small motor skills. And teeth brushing skills are rather subpar

Balance
I rode a skateboard once for two feet if that
I put on rollerblades and couldn't even stand up
I fell about 50 times on cross country skies the one afternoon I used those
when the escalator is not working I hold on to the rails for dear life (and vertigo is a real thing)

Executive Functioning
I can cook two things at once maximum. Would never contemplate doing a thanksgiving dinner
at work I have to write out and screenshot every step possible to be able to do processes (habit forming is super important.)
video games - I put those at super easy difficulty level. I love RPG games and those help me on how to navigate menus & accounting systems in fast hectic paced situations. That helps with me being an accountant.

Memory
I dont know if this is related to dyspraxia; but if I am stressed out with people demanding answers I completely blank. They tend to get frustrated so my brain decides I better say something and hope for the best. People have thought I was a liar. It's more that Im playing the odds I might be right and they need to go on their way.

Touch
I hate people touching me. A simple gesture from a friend or co-worker makes me recoil. (the recoiling is very slight - but I know it's there.). I do not initiate touching or hugging. both due to the way it feels and impaired social skills from having this.
In infancy if I was sick my parents left me alone in the crib - if they picked me up I was only worse.
As a kid I hated corduroy pants. Certain fabrics I steer clear from. I prefer rough/thick clothing.
I layer clothes and I am frequently cold. I run a heater at work in the summer.

Strength
I was and still am very physically weak for my body size.
I dont lift to quote Dr. Niles Crane
I hate shaking hands due to the strength issue and holding hands (as above)

Frustration Level/Emotions
I am considered 'easily frustrated' - yet with Dyspraxia we all burn through our daily allotment of frustration way sooner than everyone else. (Remember that if you have a child with Dyspraxia. They dont quit trying - they just have hit their limit for the day)
Self-esteem/Self-confidence was obviously super low through life.
The Filter - if I am super stressed; off goes the filter and curse words and insults flow freely!

I discovered I have dyspraxia about 6 years ago. It has made me far less hard on myself. Im more accepting. When I have a bad day when things pile up I now know why. Writing alot helps. And talking to myself outloud. It's the main ways I've learned to organize my thoughts.

I now realise my main symptoms derive from my brain generating more thoughts than I can organise, clumsiness and poor spatial awareness and an inability to regulate my behaviour in socially constructive ways (speak to loud/soft and interrupt others).

Sorry you did not get a response. I plan to give one in due course.

FromtheHill wrote: ↑Tue Apr 23, 2024 4:19 am For me the classic childhood symptoms included:
unable to tie shoestrings (until the very last day of Kindergarten. Since then it's been a struggle. I miss velcro)
could not ride a bike until age 10.
I was the worst player on the worst baseball team in little league.

Speech
Had to attend speech therapy from 3rd to 5th grade. They called it 'lazy tongue' back then. That was a confidence booster LOL.
I was very loud - unable to modulate my voice for volume.
Terrible singer - I lack the ability to have any control over singing.
speaking voice - same thing; I run flat/monotone; mumble words when tired.

Taste
Super finicky/picky eater from day one. As an infant if the food wasnt covered in chocolate pudding I didnt want it
certain food flavors are way too intense. I have no idea how anyone can eat Bananas. The consistency and flavor is nasty to me. I haven't eat the most basic food items from cottage cheese, pineapple, Mac & cheese, etc. Cooked/boiled vegetables I cannot eat. the texture of most foods creep me out.

Smell
Certain smells overwhelm me. I have to put a towel at the foot of my bedroom door if anyone cooks flavor intense foods. It's easier for me to let them cook their food and I'll manage my own issues.

Eyesight
I have amazing eyesight (Im 50 and wear reading glasses only for ease)
but spatial awareness & map reading etc I score myself super low. I get lost a lot while driving and add in extra time.
I dont use GPS for fear it'll cause me to have accidents
**I didnt even want to learn how to drive until 18.

Fine Motor Skills (for these I have gotten better at age - but still struggle from time to time.)
buttoning a shirt took at least two attempts. I always had one more button at the top and an extra loop at the bottom
putting on a belt - I would miss a loop all the time; not even realizing it.
Zippers on jackets - those things are a menace. I jammed them up all the time.
tying a tie - I couldn't do it until early 20s. And I couldn't do it by watching myself in a mirror. I nearly failed Cub Scouts due to my lack of knot tying skills
Penmanship - my handwriting is atrocious; especially cursive. I quit cursive by 12th grade. No teacher ever scolded me for that.
Shop class - I was a solid D student. I cannot draw the same thing twice - meaning I could never be a cartoonist.

Personal Hygiene
By hair is very wavy/curly/tangly if I grow it long. And In the 1970s/1980s we all did. My hair looked like a rat's nest. I couldn't comb my hair at all. I wish I had kept it short & tight as I do now.
Dental hygiene - also terrbile. I cant floss due to small motor skills. And teeth brushing skills are rather subpar

Balance
I rode a skateboard once for two feet if that
I put on rollerblades and couldn't even stand up
I fell about 50 times on cross country skies the one afternoon I used those
when the escalator is not working I hold on to the rails for dear life (and vertigo is a real thing)

Executive Functioning
I can cook two things at once maximum. Would never contemplate doing a thanksgiving dinner
at work I have to write out and screenshot every step possible to be able to do processes (habit forming is super important.)
video games - I put those at super easy difficulty level. I love RPG games and those help me on how to navigate menus & accounting systems in fast hectic paced situations. That helps with me being an accountant.

Memory
I dont know if this is related to dyspraxia; but if I am stressed out with people demanding answers I completely blank. They tend to get frustrated so my brain decides I better say something and hope for the best. People have thought I was a liar. It's more that Im playing the odds I might be right and they need to go on their way.

Touch
I hate people touching me. A simple gesture from a friend or co-worker makes me recoil. (the recoiling is very slight - but I know it's there.). I do not initiate touching or hugging. both due to the way it feels and impaired social skills from having this.
In infancy if I was sick my parents left me alone in the crib - if they picked me up I was only worse.
As a kid I hated corduroy pants. Certain fabrics I steer clear from. I prefer rough/thick clothing.
I layer clothes and I am frequently cold. I run a heater at work in the summer.

Strength
I was and still am very physically weak for my body size.
I dont lift to quote Dr. Niles Crane
I hate shaking hands due to the strength issue and holding hands (as above)

Frustration Level/Emotions
I am considered 'easily frustrated' - yet with Dyspraxia we all burn through our daily allotment of frustration way sooner than everyone else. (Remember that if you have a child with Dyspraxia. They dont quit trying - they just have hit their limit for the day)
Self-esteem/Self-confidence was obviously super low through life.
The Filter - if I am super stressed; off goes the filter and curse words and insults flow freely!

I discovered I have dyspraxia about 6 years ago. It has made me far less hard on myself. Im more accepting. When I have a bad day when things pile up I now know why. Writing alot helps. And talking to myself outloud. It's the main ways I've learned to organize my thoughts.

Been thinking about this as I have my assessment soon at age 38, and been writing everything down so I have it ready.
Childhood
I used to eat with my knife and fork opposite to the "normal way" until the headteacher corrected me. Still get confused between right and left.
Couldnt tie laces til age 8
Was one of the worst at running, and worst at gymnastics - couldnt jump or land, cant do handstands, headstands, cartwheels, climb the rope etc. unable to catch a ball, and can't rollerblade/ice skate/rollerskate.

Senses
Overwhelmed mainly by smells and noise. Have to wear headphones when shopping.

House is overwhelming with clutter.

I struggle with navigating through my house, regularly bumping into doorframes, walls, catching my arm on door handles, i regularly fall over to the extent I've torn a ligament in my ankle. Miss my mouth when eating and drinking every day.

Handwriting likened to chicken scratch.
Sense of direction is appalling, except for my homing instinct.
Usually late for appointments and meeting people.
I have a scruffy appearance.

Memory
I can ask for directions and will only hear "go down the next street" but wont hear anything after that, zoned out. Same in interviews, I will hear the question but will have focused on last part and forgotten the first part i.e. "give me an example of"

If overwhelmed, usually sensory issues, then i will explode.

that all makes sense to me - I hope your assessment works out well for you.

Thank you, hope so too, just a month to go. Took me like 4 days to complete the forms. I also didnt realise the sleep thing was a dyspraxic thing. Some days im super fatigued.

I suspect my being fatigued is mostly due to my brain over working and me trying to process all the thoughts it throws up when I am mentally active - alternatively I get stuck on one thing often not dealing with more important matters. It is really difficult to explain.

Dangerously impulsive! Stretching myself so thin and becoming overwhelmed and shutting down for weeks, months or years at a time. I am currently recovering from a 14 month shut down after losing my 2 businesses, second family, fiancé and an entire town/community worth of connections and friends in Norfolk due to my impulsivity, poor emotional control and exceptionally addictive personality.

Anxiety and depression are common place as a result of being unable to process emotion. Medication, routine and a reasonable diet seem to help. In terms of being prone to addiction i was also an alcoholic for ten years (20-24 units a night), something i would be interested in talking about privately with any other recovering addicts with dyspraxia (but i dont want to council anyone on it, just share experiences) PM me if you are interested in a discussion?

Emotions are the biggest hurdle, having a very challenging life as well as poorly managing the emotional eruptions caused by Dispraxia have ended up leaving me splatted like a bowl of spaghetti dropped on the floor. Being super sensitive to my own emotions and being a kinesthetic/Emotional thinker and learner have made my life exceptionally hard, this is something i would love to learn more about in terms of how you all manage your emotions when it comes to Dispraxia. PMs from all are absolutely welcome regarding this. I am getting councilling and have been doing a lot of online research and have bought books on how to change the pattern of thinking, however with the attention span of a carrot i find it hard to focus on the collective of words tightly pressed together on a page.

At this point I am surprisingly well co-ordinated and dextrous when it comes to cooking (16 years and hundreds of cuts and scolds later I am proud to say I am a good chef!) My sensitivity to flavours, textures and smells have given me an excellent pallet even for a smoker. I also played piano for around 20 years so I feel my hobbies and career choices have helped me practice and overcome some of the more physical challenges, however i often wear clothes the wrong way round or inside out and I can often be seen as dusk throwing work boots at the wall in lace-oriented frustration. I struggle with remembering to practice personal hygiene and maintenance like shaving (often unevenly!), tooth brushing (ive lost 7 teeth now) and sometimes washing, however my partner is forgiving and aids me with a compassionate nudge where needed.

Touch - Always hated being touched or hugged. I am exceptionally ticklish too so this may be a factor! However it did cause me to believe I was asexual for the majority of my adult life, now I am happily partnered with my boyfriend, who may indulge in annoying me with tickles now and then but he is helping me become more used to hugs and helping me explore my sexuality with unlimited patience and compassion. He is Autistic so loves hugging and tight cuddles which I can find challenging and suffocating at times.

Spatial awareness Broke my nose by walking into three trees in a row haha. Always on the lookout for hazards at this point, loud and heavy handed in the kitchen to my work mates dismay, but they are slowly learning to understand why i work the way i do, and my managers have my back when it comes to disrpaxia in work. I am no stranger to bumping into people or parked cars and lamp-posts. I keep my room exceptionally clean and my going out bag packed and ready, although this takes around 45 minutes a day to organise, re check and double check and sometimes can be very frustrating if i forget to pack an essential like house keys.

Memory Paired with 10 years alcoholism I believe living in the moment and planning for the future is the best perspective to take, and i take alot of photos now of family, outings, friends and anything i want to recall that has sentimental value. Bookmarking websites and recording passwords on hardback has proven helpful. I have lost alot of my memories long term and my short term memory is practically none. It took me around a month just to remember the names of my best friends Mother, Sister and Niece. It isnt troublesome though, the people i care about all know it is a challenge for me and they are happy to remind me frequently.

Balance Falling over nothing, standing still and yet see-sawing almost to the point of falling over. Bending over and getting back up can see me falling head first or butt-first onto the floor on occasion. Directionally i dont struggle with left or right, but often begin to walk to the wrong location in the kitchen or house/work and then needing to re-callobrate to the desired location - its good excersize! haha. this is something to do with subconscious movement - knowing you need to get to a place, however my brain doesnt process the location or processes it wrong, leaving me wandering aimlessly quite frequently, especially if im in a rush!

Speech sometimes its hard to get words out. But for the most part I am very much a talkative person, and my history of voice acting and being in theatre have helped me practice speaking under pressure, so speech has never been a challenge really for me, only when i am tired, anxious or stressed do i have the occasional vocal hiccup, its sort of like dyslexia but with speaking instead of reading, however as i say it is rare, perhaps once or twice a day on a good day.

Sleep Attrocious - truth be told im sort of hooked on nytol one a night sleeping pills of which i take two a night. Doctors insist on "just sleeping naturally, well im sorry bucko but it aint working and you aint listening. VERY frustrating! Lack of sleep is one of the primary factors that causes my depression, anxiety, flight or fight and dangerous emotional incompetence! Definitely a struggle without medication.

Not having the support from schools or the government, not even a panthlet! has led to me being at this very frustrating and difficult part in my life, however it is only recently i took dispraxia seriously after a year of trying to work out if it was Bipolar, depression, Anxiety, ADHD, autism! Yoi name it ive researched it. I am glad to have sourced the culprit, and am actively taking anxiety and depression meds, awaiting councilling and spreading the word to my "village" so they can support and understand me; of course i am and will always there for them too! I dont feel shame in spreading the word or asking for help where needed, not anymore!

Again i am happy for anyone to begin a discussion in PM should you want to share or relate to any of the challenges i have encountered.
Thanks everyone for sharing, and for reading x

I have trouble with coordination, like sometimes tripping over my own feet or bumping into things. Writing by hand can be messy, and I often struggle with fine motor tasks like tying shoelaces or using scissors. I also find it hard to organize my thoughts or tasks, so planning can be a bit of a challenge. Simple daily routines can sometimes feel overwhelming, and I often have to double-check my work for mistakes.

Tying shoelaces
Walking up and downstairs
Sports

I’ve noticed a few things that really stand out with dyspraxia. For me, coordination can be a real struggle, like tripping over my own feet or having a hard time with sports. Fine motor skills are tough, too—simple tasks like tying shoelaces or handwriting can be frustrating. I also tend to have issues with planning and organizing things, which can throw a wrench in daily tasks.

I am 72 years old and retired. It only began to dawn on me about 5 years ago that I had dyspraxia. The symptoms that were most noticeable on the surface was my lifelong struggle with left and right and my clumsiness with tying my shoes. When someone was giving me directions, they insisted on saying turn right or left, which left me scrambling in my brain to remember which way right or left was. I would quickly try to reason it out but would sometimes guess wrong. I can tie my shoes, but with a method that looks ridiculous to most people. Mainly my children. When at work I would often be asked to tie someone's apron. I would in my clumsy way. I'd usually see them retying it later on.

When I began to read about dyspraxia, suddenly a whole laundry list of things that I had problems with throughout my life began to make sense. Potty training was a struggle. Running was impossible. I did a thudding trot which resulted in my being famous in the 1st grade as the slowest runner ever. Swimming was out too. My interest in sports was low simply because I sucked at it. Yeah, I was that guy who was picked last when choosing up teams. I gave up trying, at least when I had a choice. Gym teachers were perplexed. Looking back, I know that I should have tried exercising more on my own. Doing some things that I could do. Lifting weights. Taking fast walks. But when I was young, there wasn't as many resources to help me get on track with those things. Luckily, I learned to ride a bike pretty well. That gave me some exercise. Killer thighs, but the rest of me didn't match.

So, stemming from that my self-esteem was super low. Social anxiety was epic. As I've aged, I've learned to cope. Some medications have helped me with a good bit of it. The emotional scars are still there though.

josephus14 wrote: ↑Fri Nov 22, 2024 2:51 pm I am 72 years old and retired. It only began to dawn on me about 5 years ago that I had dyspraxia. The symptoms that were most noticeable on the surface was my lifelong struggle with left and right and my clumsiness with tying my shoes. When someone was giving me directions, they insisted on saying turn right or left, which left me scrambling in my brain to remember which way right or left was. I would quickly try to reason it out but would sometimes guess wrong. I can tie my shoes, but with a method that looks ridiculous to most people. Mainly my children. When at work I would often be asked to tie someone's apron. I would in my clumsy way. I'd usually see them retying it later on.

When I began to read about dyspraxia, suddenly a whole laundry list of things that I had problems with throughout my life began to make sense. Potty training was a struggle. Running was impossible. I did a thudding trot which resulted in my being famous in the 1st grade as the slowest runner ever. Swimming was out too. My interest in sports was low simply because I sucked at it. Yeah, I was that guy who was picked last when choosing up teams. I gave up trying, at least when I had a choice. Gym teachers were perplexed. Looking back, I know that I should have tried exercising more on my own. Doing some things that I could do. Lifting weights. Taking fast walks. But when I was young, there wasn't as many resources to help me get on track with those things. Luckily, I learned to ride a bike pretty well. That gave me some exercise. Killer thighs, but the rest of me didn't match.

So, stemming from that my self-esteem was super low. Social anxiety was epic. As I've aged, I've learned to cope. Some medications have helped me with a good bit of it. The emotional scars are still there though.

Hi and welcome to the Forum

The emotional impact of living with dyspraxia too often doesn't get the attention it merits. The whole you just need to try harder can do a lot of damage.