Hi
I am new here and just wondered if anyone else here who is dyspraxic and married to a partner with Asperger's? I have never been officially diagnosed and had not heard of dyspraxia until my son as diagnosed, but that is fine. I am, and always have experienced, mental health issues that go hand in hand with dyspraxia in adults. It is even harder for me (and no doubt my husband) as we seem to live in two very different worlds and this is often very difficult and brings out the worst in me.
Diane
Anyone else here who is dyspraxic and married to a partner with Asperger's?
Moderator: Moderator Team
Re: Anyone else here who is dyspraxic and married to a partner with Asperger's?
Hi Diane
Apologies this has gone unresponded to, a lot of the debate is on social media now.
I know of various people in the community who are in relationships with other neurodivergent folk. It's a good thing insofar as each will have insight into the others difficulties and journey. However, I think it can sometimes be a case that people begin to dislike the traits in their partner that they deplore in themselves, and a partner becomes increasingly unsympathetic to their partner's struggles as they become overly and inwardly focused on their own. Then there's the male pride thing, which means guys typically bottle up our own fears and problems and not talk about them so regrettably resentment can breed and communication breaks down.
Hoping you both find a way to work through your difficulties and come out the other side in a stronger and happier partnership.
Apologies this has gone unresponded to, a lot of the debate is on social media now.
I know of various people in the community who are in relationships with other neurodivergent folk. It's a good thing insofar as each will have insight into the others difficulties and journey. However, I think it can sometimes be a case that people begin to dislike the traits in their partner that they deplore in themselves, and a partner becomes increasingly unsympathetic to their partner's struggles as they become overly and inwardly focused on their own. Then there's the male pride thing, which means guys typically bottle up our own fears and problems and not talk about them so regrettably resentment can breed and communication breaks down.
Hoping you both find a way to work through your difficulties and come out the other side in a stronger and happier partnership.
Tom
Moderator/Administrator
With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)
Moderator/Administrator
With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)
Re: Anyone else here who is dyspraxic and married to a partner with Asperger's?
I find if you let the bad fights happen but make up.
I know that sounds weird, but what I mean is, set the precedent that the big fights *can* (and they sometimes do, even with any run of the mill couple), the important bit is after the fight that you make up, or put the fight in its compartment and know "you're both working together on it" even if you're angry with one another.
I've never had an argument bad enough that enough work and understanding afterward hasn't repaired it to a better/deeper place than it was before.
I know that sounds weird, but what I mean is, set the precedent that the big fights *can* (and they sometimes do, even with any run of the mill couple), the important bit is after the fight that you make up, or put the fight in its compartment and know "you're both working together on it" even if you're angry with one another.
I've never had an argument bad enough that enough work and understanding afterward hasn't repaired it to a better/deeper place than it was before.