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explaining dyspraxia to family or not?

Posted: Thu Dec 06, 2018 7:49 pm
by allesandro
I've never discussed my dyspraxia with my family because I don't believe they have the ability to grasp it, or would they believe it is something real. I'll be 63 in the coming year and disabled due to diabetes for the past two years. Two weeks ago while I was visiting, I gave my sister some helpful advise I got from my eye doctor about dry eyes. As a result my 90 yr. old mother and 67 yr. old sister came up with the brilliant idea that I should try my hand at medical school( I flunked out of nursing school 30 yrs. ago because of my dyspraxia) but they don't remember. But even if I didn't, who would embark upon medical school in their mid-sixties? Sometimes, I feel like I'm dealing with aliens. Does anyone else have this type of experience??

Re: explaining dyspraxia to family or not?

Posted: Thu Dec 06, 2018 8:44 pm
by Andrew_S_Hatton
Yes -sometimes one does not know when to speak and when not to sometime - I just try to accept that folks who do not feel like me may not understand how I feel.

I am pleased not to be the only over sixty bod here. I am 69 for about another week or so.

Re: explaining dyspraxia to family or not?

Posted: Thu Dec 06, 2018 10:43 pm
by Tom fod
Is it a generational thing or merely just those that don't have to contend with Dyspraxia, will naturally take the stance that it's 'not a real thing'?

You could take the fact that they still feel you should consider Med School as belief in you, and high regard of your intelligence, even if the idea is pie in the sky.

Re: explaining dyspraxia to family or not?

Posted: Thu Dec 06, 2018 11:32 pm
by allesandro
yeah, but I don't. I consider it to be ridiculous. Who embarks upon a new career at age 63? so, if they don't get something as simple as this, how could they get something far more complex?

Re: explaining dyspraxia to family or not?

Posted: Sat Dec 08, 2018 9:18 am
by Tom fod
Difficulty is other people rarely say anything that is entirely in tune with how we see things.

Have you gently pointed out to them that given you're in your early 60's, now is harddly time to be starting a career in medicine as a physician?

Re: explaining dyspraxia to family or not?

Posted: Sat Dec 08, 2018 9:42 am
by Jim
allesandro wrote: Thu Dec 06, 2018 11:32 pm yeah, but I don't. I consider it to be ridiculous. Who embarks upon a new career at age 63? so, if they don't get something as simple as this, how could they get something far more complex?
It’d be unusual perhaps. But it’s not unheard of for people who’ve retired or ended a career to go back into study or put themselves into a new endeavour.

It’s a diverse world.. some people benefit greatly from staying active after their main career.

Mind you.. the sheer length of training to become a medical doctor is probably not desirable once you’ve reached your 60s.

Re: explaining dyspraxia to family or not?

Posted: Sat Dec 08, 2018 3:43 pm
by allesandro
I'm already aware of this. No new career should be embarked upon in your mid 60's. That's my point. How do you explain dyspraxia to a family who doesn't understand something that simple, that basic?????

Re: explaining dyspraxia to family or not?

Posted: Sat Dec 08, 2018 7:22 pm
by Tom fod
Seeing as though they seem a bit in awe of you, you cd put it as simply as I"ve discovered there is a condition that accounts for my clumsy and disorganised state all these years and was probably the reason why I found nursing training difficult and quit. People with this condition can still achieve things as we can be very driven too.

Can understand that you feel frustrated but you can't expect them to think and understand the same way you do, Equally you should not autoomatically assume they are totally incapable of comprehending. You have to allow them the benefit of the doubt.

Re: explaining dyspraxia to family or not?

Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2018 6:06 am
by Jim
allesandro wrote: Sat Dec 08, 2018 3:43 pm I'm already aware of this. No new career should be embarked upon in your mid 60's. That's my point. How do you explain dyspraxia to a family who doesn't understand something that simple, that basic?????
Yet some people do and succeed.

Your point may be correct for you... it may not be for everyone.

Re: explaining dyspraxia to family or not?

Posted: Mon Dec 17, 2018 5:33 am
by allesandro
Jim wrote: Sun Dec 09, 2018 6:06 am
allesandro wrote: Sat Dec 08, 2018 3:43 pm I'm already aware of this. No new career should be embarked upon in your mid 60's. That's my point. How do you explain dyspraxia to a family who doesn't understand something that simple, that basic?????
Yet some people do and succeed.

Your point may be correct for you... it may not be for everyone.
Yes, I've so often heard about those people who go back to school in their mid-60's, get medical degrees and start their new careers in their 70's. What planet do you live on?

Re: explaining dyspraxia to family or not?

Posted: Mon Dec 17, 2018 8:47 pm
by Jim
Presumably I live on the same planet as you do.

It is indeed extremely unlikely to begin a medical career in your 60/70s.

But my point stands, it’s not unheard of people to occupy themselves with new studies after their retirement. Sometimes, not often perhaps some get to utilise those new gain skills gained in paid work.

That may not be for you, and only you can decide that which is something I respect.

Re: explaining dyspraxia to family or not?

Posted: Mon Dec 17, 2018 11:01 pm
by allesandro
Jim wrote: Mon Dec 17, 2018 8:47 pm Presumably I live on the same planet as you do.

It is indeed extremely unlikely to begin a medical career in your 60/70s.

But my point stands, it’s not unheard of people to occupy themselves with new studies after their retirement. Sometimes, not often perhaps some get to utilise those new gain skills gained in paid work.

That may not be for you, and only you can decide that which is something I respect.
So glad you zoomed right in on the salient point I was making in my post, and didn't choose to focus on a minor issue used to illustrate the point.

Re: explaining dyspraxia to family or not?

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2018 7:48 am
by Jim
I detect a tone of sarcasm in you.

Look, I’m sorry that I hold a perspective not in line with your own. But this is a forum and we are free to express our views openly.

Re: explaining dyspraxia to family or not?

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2018 8:38 am
by Tom fod
Agree your Mother and Sister's notion is at least crass but maybe they feel that your being occupied is tried and tested way to help you be content?

Re: explaining dyspraxia to family or not?

Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2018 1:33 pm
by AdiB47
I have come close to talking to family about it but in actuality I have only told my wife. I’m not sure what my parents would gain from it. Either it would make little to no difference or they’d feel guilty for not getting things checked out earlier. Neither outcome makes a big difference to my life now. The only thing I’d gain is a bit less aggro for my forgetfulness and clumsiness but they are not mean about it anyway.

Other family members have certain prejudices or ignorances that I’d have to deal with and I’ve not yet felt it was worth it. Every family is different, though, so for others it may make more sense.

That said, I wouldn’t hide it if it became relevant or if I was attending an event or getting extra support in further studies. I just haven’t volunteered it.