Ignorance/assumptions/WE ARE INDIVIDUALS

[Roxy86]

A short while ago, after a follow up appointment with my GP to discuss my referral, I printed a page from the Dyspraxic Foundation website titled: What is Dyspraxia? and I believe, the sub section was called something along the lines of 'Dyspraxia in Adults' ...Anyhow, it was only a short piece, deffo not a full A4 page or anything too in-depth, just the covered the basics

I thought my colleagues at work would benefit from reading this as I felt it may help them to understand me better and get the best out of me. I printed one copy and left it out on a table where everyone could see it and even wrote on it something like; FAO, ALL colleagues: Please take a minute to read this, it would be very much appreiciated. Thank you '

I came into work the next day and it had gone

I asked if anyone had seen it and some people were very helpful and said they had read it, and put it back where they found it/passed it on to another colleague. When I asked my manager the same, her reply were words to this effect;

'I don't need to read it, I know what it is'

Refering to a previous conversation we had, where I told her I was awaiting a referral for a diagnosis and she told me her friends' little boy had Dyspraxia, and he was 'far worse' than me

What makes me so cross is that she fails to acknowledge that every person is an individual, and that just because child A has Dyspraxia, Adult B is entirely different, not only in age and sex, but also the capacity in which she knows them... It is completely irrelevant whatever she THINKS she knows about ME, is based purely on her own ill founded, assumptions!!

Sorry to rant at you all but as you can probably tell, this woman REALLY gets my goat! Lol!

PS: I found the print out in the bin in the end. I am pretty sure I know who put it in there, but, unlike SOME people, I don't like to just 'assume' these things!

[scififreak1992]

At my work I have the same problem. I have made countless notes for myself as well as others at work (brightly coloured so I will take notice and hopefully others too) but they just keep getting taken down. It doesn't help that I am more work focused that some and definately not as sociable and they take it as my being rude. I can't really take it up with my manager because we're on our 6th I think since I started work there just over 3 years ago, and this one doesn't take anything anyone says seriously.

I have been trying to look for other jobs but I am really not comfortable with all the rejection and not knowing whats happening. My Mum keeps telling me to look for other jobs and I try to explain and she half laughs as if my rejections aren't worth anything, but I don't take things the same way she does. Trying to explain that I am not the same as other people (even though she's the one who pushed for my diagnosis over a decade ago) is really hard. I have given up explaining to strangers or friends since my own Mother doesn't get it. *sigh*

[Roxy86]

Hi Scififreak1992, firstly, a huge welcome to the forum! and thank you for your reply...

Do you work in retail too per chance?? We've had 9 or 10 managers since our store opened 8yrs ago this year! That in itself can be very unsettling I find
Your mother 'doesn't get it' either huh? It's hard isn't it. I try and simplify it by saying 'my brain just works differently to others' but some people just don't seem to care/want to know/or even try to understand I've been accused of attention seeking before and that is just not in my nature at all. I am as honest and hard working as they come, and although I feel I am sorely misunderstood on a daily basis, my heart is in the right place

[scififreak1992]

Hey Roxy86!

Yeah, how'd you guess? haha
I have no idea where I stand when each manager comes in since they each have their own points of focus. Though this manager doesn't seem to have a focus at all which makes it kind of worse.

My Mum understands the child problems of dyspraxia but not that adult ones. In recent years she's been all about Aspergers and Autism Awareness since my little brother finally got his diagnosis about 4 years ago when he was 16. He doesn't understand either since his world view is "This is how I feel so this is how everyone must feel, and if not I shall make them feel that way with big words used harshly and loudly"...or at least it was until very recently.

Have you heard that dyspraxia used to be called Minimal Brain Damage? I like it I have tried telling people and myself that I'm just different/retarded/whovian/Hufflepuff/Nerdfighter/Dyspraxic/weird...but people still expect me to behave like them and it puts them off being my friend. Just now I'm being accused of being mean but when we trace back chains of events its because I've taken a different meaning to something they did/said/facially expressed and felt hurt.

I recently seem to have lost my best friend(only close friend outside of My Mum, Brother, Brothers Ex Girlfriend/Mother of his child/my Boyfriend/My Dad) because she started assuming things about me even when she knows I would never do things to hurt anyone and that I am a good person. I can't even bitch about people properly because I own up and explain why I said things. Honesty is always best

[Roxy86]

Lol! Just a hunch!

What department are you on? I do part time on Checkouts, and café as/when they need me, which is nice cos it breaks up the days sometimes and makes me feel wanted/needed It's only a small store so I can JUST about cope under the pressure in there! Lol!

I'm having weekly counselling at the moment, mainly due to the lack of understanding/bond with my mum unfortunately I had them at college too for bullying and loved it, I couldn't wait for my next session to come round again!

One of the first things I read online was that it was previously known as that, I can see why. Did you know The Dyspraxia Foundation do an alert card you can put in your purse/wallet that gives an overview of what Dyspraxia is and how it may affect us? It's £5 and I've yet to order mine, but think it would be quite useful to have to hand

[Roxy86]

Lol! Just a hunch!

What department are you on? I do part time on Checkouts, and café as/when they need me, which is nice cos it breaks up the days sometimes and makes me feel wanted/needed It's only a small store so I can JUST about cope under the pressure in there! Lol!

I'm having weekly counselling at the moment, mainly due to the lack of understanding/bond with my mum unfortunately I had them at college too for bullying and loved it, I couldn't wait for my next session to come round again!

One of the first things I read online was that it was previously known as that, I can see why. Did you know The Dyspraxia Foundation do an alert card you can put in your purse/wallet that gives an overview of what Dyspraxia is and how it may affect us? It's £5 and I've yet to order mine, but think it would be quite useful to have to hand

[scififreak1992]

I'm mostly on tills but with other responsibilities. The off the tills part of my job is rather vague which stresses me out so much. I mostly just get left on the tills and face up around with some putting stock out but I also am the only one in the shop who can do the newspapers and magazines paperwork fully (this includes all supervisors and managers) so I am left to do that. I love the responsibility and although it gets shunned by everyone else because it suposedly "not important" (though thats the place where the most losses were) I find it the best part about my job. That and my customers who can be such a laugh sometimes

I was always tempted to go to counselling but then I'd get sucked back into my Mum's good graces and into the place in my head when I have no friends and I end up talking to my Mum at 2am and realising how well she knows me. Also I think she would get offended that I'd rather go elsewhere that talk to her. Is it really helpful?

Oh wow, I have just been paid so I may invest in that!