Dyspraxic Adults

I think I am very open with my feelings, It's just that I haven't had the chance of dating in the first place to develop a relationship later on.

Maybe I discuss my feeling alittle, but my mates don't really want to hear, so I don't bother, but I guess it depends what is happening in a relationship for a mate to relate to it and open up, and that certainly won't happen when there is anymore than two guys around.

I have just been reading parts of this thread. I believe that it is better to be single than in an unhappy realationship.
I haven't had very much experience with boyfriends and I would find it hard to even have a conversation with someone I liked. The 2 relationships I had were vey short and I found them difficult. If I am having any problems in my life then I tend to become distant. My last boyfriend took this personally. When he ended things I tried to explain but he wouldn't listen.
This was 3 years ago and I am still unsure about wheather or not I could handle a relationship. Maybe I could if I met someone special and understanding. But at the moment I think I am better on my own. It is hard enough to handle my own emotions and feeling without taking on someone eles too.

Hello All,

So Ive read throught the respsonses. and I can say I am sad to see so many give up on the idea of relationships. I believe they are key to our successes beyond Dysparaxia. I just recently lost my mother to cancer, god bliss*. And I was seeing this girl, we started dating the day my mum passed away, and broke up excalty a month later. She tore my world apart. I was so confused about why, and reading a bit on what you guys already shared it seemed logical that i was facing a a similar situtation as some of you. The hurting was so strong because i was immature and believed that she was the one who was going to save me. And i couldnt believe that the relationship ended.

I gave up on the idea that i was going to have any new relationships. Because my social compass is twisted. I am so shy around new faces, and sometimes its worse becasue I usually always go home regrgetting something that was not said or did. It was all until I started hanging out with a real old ex. She was the first girl I ever dated. I was 15 she was 18ish. We both shared a common intrest in our desire to see live music. I did love the time we had spent together. We just recently met again, through the MYSPACE, and have been hanging out on a weekly basis for lke a month and a bit. And all i can saw is that I do love her to bits. She is the kindest and sweetest girl ive ever met. She struggles with formulated plans, and lack of self confidence. So I want to be the one who can help her with that,.

We are going out on saturday night, and it will be the night i tell her everything about everything. Its the look in her eyes, she is so beautiful.

So I do hope that you all can find the confidence in yourselves and be assertive. Dont worry if its to much or too little, the persons reactions will be your guide. DONT SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF. Its all about confidence in your self and the integrity to go out and make the things you wish to have happen.

"To Dream anything that you want to dream. That is the beauty of the human mind. To do anything you want to do. That is the strength of the human will. To trust yourself to test your limits. That is the courage to succeed."

- Bernard Edmonds

I encourage all of you to find the time to meditate, and generate some loving-kindess towards yourselves. Me being a buddhist, I find its my greatest strength. The path has shown me that no matter what your thinking you are still abouve that, and not matter how much external conflict there is, you are always in control. I am learning to step beyond fear into fearlessness. Its all a matter of objective and percervierence. You must know what you want and then be not afraid to take the risks involved in getting what it is excalty you want.

Cheers,

-Ax

good luck for saturday ACID.

My lovelife can only be described by the words of Mr Larrs Ulrich of Metallica. "It's like an eternal limp d**k with an occasional blow job"

It's been 3 years of singledom, with the occasional one night stand or fling, but no sign of a relationship, it's odd when i talk to a member of the opposite sex, if i get a smile out of them it ends with a friendship only. Even one year, each of the ladies i went for, decided my friends were better for them!

I like someone who I do voluntary work but he is older than me. I am 22, he is 28. I have not had a relationship for nearly 3 years. I feel that I know nothing about them connected with myself. I understand other peoples fine but not my own. I have no idea how he feels, if he is single or if I want a relationship.. I think thaat I am not ready for one at the moment, but I still feel this way. It's something I have no one to talk to about so I am talking to you guys on here.

I tried to start a conversation with a girl sitting opposite me in a pub on Friday. I said hi, but she hadn't heard exactly what I said, so she leaned forward, and I repeated it. She said hi, flung back in her chair and carried on talking.

This happened to me the other week as well.

david456 wrote:I tried to start a conversation with a girl sitting opposite me in a pub on Friday. I said hi, but she hadn't heard exactly what I said, so she leaned forward, and I repeated it. She said hi, flung back in her chair and carried on talking.

This happened to me the other week as well.

Have you tried speaking to anybody while they're on their own? I know, it's relatively letch-like but I've always seem to come out with at least some form of conversation (hell it's sometimes resulted with a phone number and a few of my previous relationships!). But sometimes when you come up to a lady talking to someone else, they don't really like having their conversations interrupted! Previous experience!

Recently, i went to gig with a few of my friends, and got to know a very gorgeous girl who was perfect for me (She loves comics! How can i not find her perfect? lol) but unfortunately she's going out with an old friend of mines brother, this wasn't helped by my mate yelling "Get in there! She's all yours!"

lol i just got a text telling me he's set me up with someone at his girlfriends university! Looks like I'm making a trip to Winchester pretty soon!

i recently found this site and was reading through a lot of different posts and have found a lot of this really helpful, but there's still something (actually a lot) missing and wondering if others are effected in the same way i am.

generall i have a pretty good socializing skills and have no huge problems talking to people. however i speak a bit slowly, not with a stutter or anything like that but i fumble with choosing my words. while my close friends get me and dont think anything about it, when i talk to new people i catch strange looks from them. when im at parties and i see someone from across the way who id like to talk to, ill start to walk towards her and then have a panic attack of sorts. between the loud atmosphere, the nervousness and choosing good words to say, i cut and return to where my friends are.

im just curious if anyone experiences this and has some tips that might help me find the right words more quickly in my head and not panic in loud crowds.

I tend to trip when I'm really nervous, or/and when reading aloud to a college class.

I've never been able to manage a relationship; I'm not really sure about what to do in that sort of situation. I want to find out what its like, but I've never been able to.

People out there have dry spells, but metaphorically speaking my life is a dry desert that has never seen so much as a drop of water.

I had a holiday romance while in Australia. It was the only vaguely romantic occurrence out of my seven-month trip. Better than nothing though, although it quickly transpired that things weren't working out, which reflected the previous relationship I'd had. I also feel that I'd have difficulty holding down a relationship with most girls; it would have to be someone who understood and made allowances for the weird ways I act and do things. I wouldn't say never though, Page, as you never know who might be out there.

To use the same analogy, I'd say my history of relationships was like the Australian climate: drought stricken with just enough rainfall to stave off total despair!

Remember the magic chat up line:
"Does this smell like chloroform to you"

In the absence of a massive ethical failing on your part I guess the thing to do is meet as many people as possible until one of them turns out to be suitable. There are enough nutcases in the world that someone will be right for you, just a case of finding them.

I suspect mine is hiding up a mountain somewhere.

I have a problem a lot like michaeld. Except with me I am just slow to respond when i first start a conversation. The only thing I have found to help is to bring a friend who will do a lot of the talking intill I can get my speech problem worked out.

"when im at parties and i see someone from across the way who id like to talk to, ill start to walk towards her and then have a panic attack of sorts. between the loud atmosphere, the nervousness and choosing good words to say, i cut and return to where my friends are.

im just curious if anyone experiences this and has some tips that might help me find the right words more quickly in my head and not panic in loud crowds"

With panic attacks there are no easy solutions you have to harden yourself to the siuation, by keeping on talking to girls and spending time in crowds. Eventually your body will get used to the fact that the situation is normal and not a fight/flight situation and go into overdrive as a panic attack.

By not speaking to girls, you make yourself feel worse as you get more anxious about it.

I would say when talking to other people, the best thing is to be yourself and be natural.