Dyspraxic Adults

well with the online girl, it turns out she only likes me as friend, so yet again failure and friendzone, yay. I should be used to it by now I guess, I always get carried away and my hopes up too much and it just hurts twice as much when I fail but hey onwards and upwards i guess.

It's not really failure though, there is nothing there to label yourself as a failure. Ultimately we can't control who's attracted to us.

I'm no nearer to finding a soulmate myself, and it is depressing but it is what it is. At least I'm beginning to work on my social life now, I'm no nearer to finding girlfriend but it's a start.

I work in an office full of women where I'm the only man and it's open knowledge that I am both single and on the look out. The reaction alternates between "oh, we've got to hook him up with someone" and "pfffft what do you want a relationship for anyway?" As though I'm foolish for even contemplating such a thing.

But why shouldn't I desire a girlfriend? Why is it wrong of me to desire my partner in life? Why should I be denied that special someone to goof around with, to wine and dine, to take on weekend trips, to snuggle up with on some park bench as we watch the sunset? Why should I live my life being made to feel that society has pre-judged me unworthy of such a simple but fundamental pleasure that most other people take for granted?

Do I think I would be happier if I had a girlfriend? Maybe... I don't know. But I'd like the opportunity to find out for myself.

But despite the total lack of romance in my life I've learnt to value friendship where I find it. One of the girls at work... Who it utterly unobtainable for me, but who is beautiful, cute and sweet (as well a royal pain in the proverbial) has managed to make me feel genuinely liked as a friend. Someome who takes interest in me and ramdomly contacts me to see how I am. I've had precious few people in my life who take the time to treat me as genuine friend. I know there can never be a romantic relationship between us, but in my own funny way I love her as buddy.

I too feel I want and need a more traditional type of relationship. It sometimes seems as if Tom Fod's personal virtual dating and relationships handbook is woefully out of date though I'm not sure I could cope emotionally with hook ups as I'm quite cautious not to mention inexperienced.

If someone shows an interest in me I'm totally unaware or too flabbergasted and unsure of how I should respond that I mess it up. I'm sure the aforementioned fear is a barrier too.

I guess the trick is not to see failed connections as failures, but rather as having ruled out an unsuitable person or perhaps had even a lucky escape. Not easy though.

Optimist drowns in half full tub

yeah maybe Tom, maybe. just be nice to get somewhere, i kind of needed a win at the moment as well with stuff in my life stressing and that bad break up still haunting me a little, i almost needed a rebound or something to get back into the game.

I've been chatting to a girl on Okcupid for about a week or so now.

It's going rather slow, but it's the first actual interaction I've had on one these sites in years, so I'm taking it as a blessing and not rushing into things.

We seem to have a good few vital things in common though, which I hope will be the ground for maybe a meeting in the future.

good for you, let us know how it goes and good luck!

The ones which charge to subscribe are very prone to scamming, in which they have false profiles which send you false messages in order to get you to subscribe for further options.

ugh online dating is such a pain. several times recently ive had conversations only to go nowhere or to suddenly end with one of them their profile ended up deleted mid conversation, haven't heard anything since. feel like my dating life is cursed sometimes, so many false starts.

FAndrews wrote:or to suddenly end with one of them their profile ended up deleted mid conversation, haven't heard anything since.

Same has just happened to me, can't say that I'm particularly surprised by it, but I've learnt not to take it to heart and be too dissapointed.

I'll never know why they decided to suddenly to completely ignore me, maybe they hooked up with someone else, maybe they simply didn't like me, maybe they have issues. If so, that's not going to be my problem.

scratch that, the next day i got back in contact with her, turns out her phone deleted her apps but i was able to re-establish contact and weve been chatting ever since, hoping for the best

I'm glad you're still talking with someone.

Think that I'm definitely back to square one though, as deleting a profile without a word is a pretty blunt and final way of breaking off communication

But, like I say, no point in getting too disappointed.

the trick is not to get your hopes up or expectations up too much when you message someone i think, plus there is always someone new to message

Indeed, past experience has my hopes and expectations firmly rooted on the floor.

Mind you, I'm already chatting to someone else on POF, which is pleasantly surprising.

well done, my chatting seems to be going well

Have to admit, there's no well done on my part here this one made first contact, which is a bonus, as normally I'm made to feel that I don't exist by these sites.

It's nice to be contacted by someone else for once