Positive stories about work/employers

[Tom fod]

Hi Patrick

Welcome to our community and sorry to read of your struggles and subsequent redundancy. I think we often find ourselves hitting a glass ceiling (but not the type we can break). I think the key is finding an employer who understands how to get the best from us by giving structure, but also a degree of freedom to adapt and do things in our own way. Sadly it is not very easy to find such employers.

When employers get it wrong, work becomes increasingly stressful and we can end up becoming casualties left by the wayside, If employers are unaware and unable/unwilling to make an effort to develop and get the best out of us,and recognising that some tasks will not be as easy for us and while we will try, we will likely need additional support and time. Its all about valuing diversity and recognising peoples' strengths and delegating/deploying wisely the resources available.

I also have a tendency to not be good at saying no and as a result can take on more than is reasonable or sensible sometimes.

[PatrickIreland]

Thank you Tom. I dunno, I'd be reluctant to disclose my dyspraxia to people, let alone an employer. Maybe I should have in this case, I dunno. They were quite modern and open minded, to be fair. But they said they had no need for someone like me at their company who analyzes things to the nth degree; and didn't like my way of working. They just want cash in, cash out, job done; and not perfection. I wasn't quick enough to write reports (coz our brains have a longer processing time), and when promoted to middle management I wasn't organized enough to plan things and manage staff. Meanwhile new hungry enthusiastic graduates who were on the ball were taken on for €13k less than me PA. It started with the new employee being given the flights abroad to visit clients, I was kept in the dark about these roadtrips despite being the manager for all these clients. They probably figured I wouldn't manage flights to a new country, internal flights, hiring cars etc despite being comfortable meeting clients. I was ousted a few wks after this roadtrip.

[PatrickIreland]

I was struggling to get things done quickly enough anyway, and was quick to blame the workload; yet this same workload was no problem for anyone else. An open office plan didn't suit me either due to sensory overload, if a colleague was on the phone I'd have trouble managing if I was also on the phone. That sounds so anti social, but that's just the way our brains are. In that organisation, I was a square peg trying to fit into a round hole. For my next job, I will go for something that doesn't have the same demands.

[PatrickIreland]

I reckon art/drawing/sculpture would be the perfect job for a dyspraxic. They could paint away to their heart's content, without having to interact with anybody (apart from on sales day), and wouldn't have so many conflicting priorities to juggle. They could create a masterpiece, and live in their own little world - which is what all us dyspraxics do lets face it.

[Wayward]

It's so nice to see this thread getting replies (I feel the need to thank each person and respond individually but perhaps I'm being self important...just cos I started the thread doesn't mean I have to be the hostess I suppose!) Um, thanks everyone.

Patrick, your difficulties sound so much like mine and I'm really sad to hear you got ousted like that. It's a sad reality I suppose that a lot of employers have that type of attitude. Disability equality laws only seem to go so far, like there's a 'you're not suited to the job' catchall loophole

Now that I'm in the 'reply' pane I can't seem to scroll down far enough to see who said it, so, sorry for not naming you, but...person who works as a tree surgeon: that sounds like a lovely job (I'm envisioning chainsaws though? My type of dyspraxia and chainsaws...just the thought makes me shudder) but generally I think working in a smaller team with educated people seems to be the best way to go. Would others agree?

Patrick, I did illustration at uni but due to difficulties, I ended up in retail and these days really wanting a change, to improve my circumstances.
Yes being able to work quietly at your own pace would be ideal. I don't know if others find this but I have days when I'm pretty low on symptoms or high functioning, if that makes sense? Days when my hands are willing to play ball and do what I want, I can even cope fine with background noise to an extent. But the background noise issue is a big problem for me. I'm wondering if anyone here has found a way around it with their employer, like maybe being allowed a quieter bit of office space?

Someone mentioned noise-cancelling headphones once which seems a great idea, but how do you know if the phone's ringing?!

Sorry if this is straying more into 'negative work experiences' - I suppose it's inevitable that these come up...

[PatrickIreland]

Wayward - thanks man.

Yes, I noticed someone got a job Landscaping, and fair played to him, he's loving it. Good fresh outdoor work, we're naturally suited to that since prehistoric times. Good sense of achievement after a day's work. But would I feel too intellectual for that? (I've a PhD in chemistry). Maybe I need to downsize - better to be underemployed than unemployed, which is what I am now, sponging off the tax payer the past 6 months. As Calvin Coolidge said "the world is full of educated derelicts", education means nothing if people have no persistence.

Regarding background noise, CBT tells us to expose ourselves to these situations as much as possible and try to accept them, without overreacting.

[Tom fod]

Thank you Tom. I dunno, I'd be reluctant to disclose my dyspraxia to people, let alone an employer. Maybe I should have in this case, I dunno. They were quite modern and open minded, to be fair. But they said they had no need for someone like me at their company who analyzes things to the nth degree; and didn't like my way of working.

You're welcome.

Disclosure is a tricky subject and needs to be on our terms. I completely rewrote and reorganised the format of my disclosure document but even now I have concerns about it being read in isolation and my being misunderstood. There is no legal obligation to disclose and one has to trust that ones employer is able to be understanding and react positively but sensitively. It's very much a leap of faith.

It's a shame your employer handled it like they did but it's their loss. I too like to have the time to consider things thoroughly and ensure all is clear and correct. Unfortunately life and work rarely follow so it's a case of doing ones best given the circumstances. It's never easy being a perfectionist. I think we do tend to be well equipped for persistence, but need to understand when and where we can let up and where it's sensible to give up.

Wayward - Glad this discussion has worked out too. We do like to be balanced and I doubt any one of us could trot out the "everything is wonderful" BS.

Noise cancelling headphones are good but I find my ears get too warm. You should be able to still hear the fire/alarm or phone ring or someone speaking directly to you. At which case you can take them off. Some people find music helps but personally I like to be able to hear myself think as I have an 'inner dialogue' going on.

[PatrickIreland]

Despite a high IQ, many people with Dyspraxia end up unemployed, me being one of them at present. The reason for it is that despite having a terrific IQ and going to Uni, you gear up for a traditional professional career, only to find that your poor organisational skills means that you find the going tough in your chosen job. Ultimately, you hit a ceiling and must cut your losses. You need to scale it back a notch.

So what jobs are a person with Dyspraxia best suited to? This is the question that’s being going around in my head for months now. Career on the London Stock Exchange? Forget it. Anything fast-paced, high efficiency with organisational complexity is a no no. job in an SME with high hopes of large profit? You will end up in an early grave due to the stress of sensory overload.

I am thinking more public servant, post office worker, job in a charity shop; something that is not as profit and efficiency driven. Those type of jobs are fair game, and fully manageable for a person with Dyspraxia.

Any thoughts?

[Tom fod]

Completely understand and have also felt similarly despondent about career prospects and have often felt held back by my own awkwardness, differences to others and inability to drive.

We have to work harder whilst others seem to cruise along effortlessly and it is very easy to get depressed about the sheer inequality. We do have potential but finding the right niche takes hard work and a healthy dose of good luck. Employers need to be more understanding/aware that our different way of thinking if harnessed well can turn out to be an invaluable asset, not to forget our determination and loyalty.

Anyway that's my 2ps worth.

[PatrickIreland]

Cheers Tom! I will take that on board.
Trips to the gym are helping combat my idledom! Yes, there's no substitute for hard work.
Trip to a career guidance psychologist next wk might help too.
Anyway, nuff sulking out of me here!

Patrick.