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Re: Basic requirements whe looking for love

Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 2:34 pm
by Creative
I know I shouldn't expect too much of people. I'm not looking for someone who was perfect. My last boyfriend said I was perfect when we first got together. Of course he found out I'm not, as no one is.

Re: Basic requirements whe looking for love

Posted: Fri Sep 19, 2008 10:45 pm
by cat27
Ignore me ,i have had a really bad day (i guess it shows!) No no one is perfect, but it is possible to
find nice dependable people, and please just don't settle for anyone, be particular cos you sound nice and I'm sure
you deserve a nice loyal guy :)

Re: Basic requirements whe looking for love

Posted: Sat Sep 20, 2008 2:02 pm
by Creative
If I knew where to meet one! I don't like going out in the evenings and I don't get to meet young people at my voluntary placements.

Re: Basic requirements whe looking for love

Posted: Sat Sep 20, 2008 2:51 pm
by gherkin001
Stop looking and in they will waltz... I promise you that... its how I met Clive and 6 years later we're still together

Kirsty

Re: Basic requirements whe looking for love

Posted: Sat Sep 20, 2008 7:54 pm
by cat27
I know what you mean, i am in the same predicament. In my line of work there are no men anywhere near my age
and I'm not really a clubber, I'd much rather have a night in with a group of friends watching my favorite DVDs or
playing on my wii, not really conducive to finding a boyfriend!

Re: Basic requirements whe looking for love

Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2008 2:01 pm
by Creative
We should stop looking. Love is meant to come when you least expect it.

Re: Basic requirements whe looking for love

Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2008 2:19 pm
by cat27
I think your right! Besides we are still young! :)

Re: Basic requirements whe looking for love

Posted: Wed Oct 15, 2008 6:24 pm
by WTCCFan
cat27 wrote: Personality wise

1) are kind and thoughtful
2) are understanding of differences, and don't expect everyone to act like clones!
3) have "gentleman" like manners ( open doors, don't fart or belch just for fun, see their dates to their frontdoor, don't
pressurerise their dates/girlfriends for anything they are not ready for)
4) see family and friends as more important than their "career"
5) are supportive of their girlfriend/partners aspirations, and see them as just as important as their own
6) are open minded, to some extent at least, but do not have any weird perversions
7) don't like cricket, golf or other boring spectator sports
8) share the tv remote fairly
9) are willing to help with household chores
I had to laugh at Number #7 especially but the other 7 things I think are so like Dyspraxics (even #8). Many of those I can imgine myself saying. :D

I believe in qualities like fairness and equality. Maybe we all do as Dyspraxics. Maybe it is something in our nature or we have experienced together which means we want to believe in and apply fair and equal ideals.

I could have missed it but it is interesting not once have I heard anyone say anything like sense of humour or good body language (??). I often hear things like that from people who tend to be the sort who are sucesfull in relationships and the sort who tend to think they do carry some authority on the subject of relationships. I don't agree with the GSOH. Assuming it is what I think it is, how does the ability to make a funny situation out of anything help? :S

I am much more inclined to believe the things you and I believe in are what can support a relationship.

Re: Basic requirements whe looking for love

Posted: Thu Oct 16, 2008 7:42 pm
by Creative
A sense of humour is important to me. My previous boyfriends didn't have one.

Re: Basic requirements whe looking for love

Posted: Fri Oct 17, 2008 7:51 am
by WTCCFan
Creative wrote:A sense of humour is important to me. My previous boyfriends didn't have one.
Why is it important?

What type of humout would underline the "sense of humour" ideology? Is it cracking gags, is it making light of a situation or is it making fun of people in the way so many people do. Winding people up for example.

Why is the ability to make someone laugh so important?

And what role would it play in a relationship? Because I don't see cracking gags at someones funeral at being appropriate. And I don't see a practical use for it when doing everyday activities like shopping or watching TV.

I would rather have a girl that tollerated me and accepted me and didn't have a sense of humour than one who didn't tollerate and accept me and who did have a sense of homour.

Re: Basic requirements whe looking for love

Posted: Fri Oct 17, 2008 9:16 am
by Little Miss Anxious
cat27 wrote:Hi all, i would like to ask for your opinion on a certain matter. I was most upset when my brother charmingly informed me that when it comes to men, i am just too fussy and need to lower my standards! [-o< I pray this isn't true,and would like to know what others think

Here are a few basic requrirements

1) have own head of hair (at least for the next 10 years)
2) own their own set of teeth (at least untill their 70, then i doubt ill care!)lol
3) practice basic hygiene ( wash on a daily basis, brush teeth twice a day ect)

Personality wise

1) are kind and thoughtful
2) are understanding of differences, and don't expect everyone to act like clones!
3) have "gentleman" like manners ( open doors, don't fart or belch just for fun, see their dates to their frontdoor, don't
pressurerise their dates/girlfriends for anything they are not ready for)
4) see family and friends as more important than their "career"
5) are supportive of their girlfriend/partners aspirations, and see them as just as important as their own
6) are open minded, to some extent at least, but do not have any weird perversions
7) don't like cricket, golf or other boring spectator sports
8) share the tv remote fairly
9) are willing to help with household chores

i think all these things are perfectly resonable, i bet all the girls on the forum think the same, at least about some of these things ( but then maybe this is why i'm still single!)
To me that is impossible to find. What I think you will find is gentleman, generous guy, a wee bit perverse unless he doesnt love sex, funny, got hair and own set of teeth, compromises, no 4, no 9, caring, understanding but not always open minded, playful, abit envious of other men, gentle, sympathetic, sometimes acts imiture if he doesn't get his way, wants to please you and make you happy, Is excited when he sees you so he is really affectionate towards you, trys to protect you from harm, wants to be his own bus but also loves when his woman gives the orders because he finds that attractive and it tells him that the woman is very confident and isn't going to let her man control her or give the orders. Some men are attracted to aggressive women but why is that men ???

Re: Basic requirements whe looking for love

Posted: Fri Oct 17, 2008 2:02 pm
by Creative
Because it cheers me up and helps me cope with life better. My parents both have a sense of humour and get on very well together. I would like a relationship like that.

Re: Basic requirements whe looking for love

Posted: Sat Oct 18, 2008 7:48 am
by WTCCFan
Little Miss Anxious wrote:To me that is impossible to find. What I think you will find is gentleman, generous guy, a wee bit perverse unless he doesnt love sex, funny, got hair and own set of teeth, compromises, no 4, no 9, caring, understanding but not always open minded, playful, abit envious of other men, gentle, sympathetic, sometimes acts imiture if he doesn't get his way, wants to please you and make you happy, Is excited when he sees you so he is really affectionate towards you, trys to protect you from harm, wants to be his own bus but also loves when his woman gives the orders because he finds that attractive and it tells him that the woman is very confident and isn't going to let her man control her or give the orders. Some men are attracted to aggressive women but why is that men ???
What is it your effectively saying?

Because I know whilst those qualities do exist and I think can be found I think most people are too scared to be more open to trying others in case they are seen by peers as "desperate" and so become too picky to the point of being superficial because the more superficial you become the more selective you become because the less people that match those superficial qualities.

I think I am a case in point. I am not bothered at all about who I date. Obviously I think I have to have an age "floor" and "ceiling". The floor being the youngest I am prepared to date and the ceilng being the oldest. But I don't care about weight, looks, physical ability or pretty much anything else. But I know if I was to hypothetically tell a girl I am very open about who I accept in my life she will, far from actually like me, actually she will probably detest me as one who has no respect or pride in himself and because of it probably occupies a low position in society. Yet I know if I am picky I will only further decrease my chances of getting a girl...if my chances as it is aren't slim enough. I am not particularly attractive, I am not succesful, I am not talented, I am not wealthy, I am not "cool" or "trendy" and I am not exactly a "man's man". I do not have a lot of masculine traits. I wouldn't say so particularly.

So I think those qualities do exist. It is just I think when it comes to those traits in you (generally speaking), people may never find it because they are to bothered about more superficial traits.

Re: Basic requirements whe looking for love

Posted: Sat Nov 15, 2008 10:31 am
by Lithium_joe
Male pattern baldness is inherited on the X chromosome so, inquire after their mother's father for clues and ask if their paternal uncles have an affinity for hats. :rolleyes:

There's some research that supports this legend, although there's no one gene responsible but it is apparently a recessive x trait (like being colour-blind; which I am) men have XY chromosomes, women have XX, so if women inherit a recessive X trait for baldness it does not manifest because the it is suppressed by the other dominant X chromosome and then possibly passed onto their children who may be XX or XY. In men this does not happen if you inherit the fault X trait it is manifest and then male pattern baldness will probably result.

Re: Basic requirements whe looking for love

Posted: Wed Nov 19, 2008 6:03 pm
by Lumic
7) don't like cricket, golf or other boring spectator sports
8) share the tv remote fairly

these are the only 2 that my bf doesnt do which doesnt bother me as i love any sports to watch and cos of this the remote doesnt bother me as we like watching the smae things

i guess i must just be lucky and i realise this every day even thou he works away i have never been this happy before i am treated like an equal even thou he know i have dyspraxia he never holds any of it against me, we have soo much fun and ive become really caring towards him would do any thing etc ... where as normal i wouldnt or to be honest dont think in my 28 years have been in love as i know know what it is...all this after 8 mths aswell were taking it slow not rushing in to moving in etc as we know we will be together for many many years.. hes even turned down workin xmas for extra money(even thou that would help him) as hed prefer to spend xmas with me.. now thats nice.. he does little things for me aswell as big and always makes me feel like a princess and makes me feel special.. we have a fantastic realtionship as he goes out with his mates i go out with mine and its not a problem in the slightest.. we very rarely argue cos we dont really have anything to argue about... any ways you can dispose of sick bags now!!!