My dyspraxia is ruining my reltionship

[shey]

oh dear!!! i am 42 and the happiest i have ever been, this is due to being single for 5 yrs!!!! 3 children all of whom are dyspraxic! & from 3 different fathers (embarassing but true) I Am extremely dyspraxic & a very frustrating friend/sister/daughter/mother/grandmother/wife/girlfiriend & i don't care anymore! lol x but as a young girl, i drove myself to distraction, because all i heard is "she is lazy" "your useless" "selfish!" "arrogant" oh i can go on & on & on, the best advice i can give young people with Dyspraxia is to learn as much as you can about yourself before entering into a relationship, knowing yourself inturn helps you explain yourself to someone else in simple terms! x if you do nothing else! spend your days researching, going to self help groups, talk talk n talk some more (well type if you find talking difficult!!) , see proffessionals, don't let them bull **** u!!! you have a right to counselling, physio etc don't take no for an answer. Don't feel ashamed to have to take pils (if they help) i will now be on medication for the rest of my life! again I DON'T CARE! they help me, but i wouldn't have done this when i was a young girl & i soooooooo wish i had, so many wasted years, do it now rather than later learn all about dyspraxia and yourself , what you are capable of, what your not capable of, learn to recognise a good day from a bad day , also if you are in a relationship with someone who has Dyspraxia, know that sometimes you may not be helping the person with dyspraxia if you have issues of your own (that are vague) you need to be pretty strong and happy in your own skin to be comfortable around someone sooo dyspraxic, i personally would not be able to help a partner & function myself, it simply would not happen :0( x saying that having dyspraxia has helped me fight for my children to be educated and to know themselves soooo well & be sooo happy in there own skin that they are wonderful human beings!!! & mentally healthy tooooo!! (& they don't get upset with me when i ask them "when where you actually born??) ha ha ha !! (or sorry who are you?) ok so not quite so bad! but out of sight is often out of mind for a dyspraxic!! lol x waffled on long enuf me thinks!!
shey x x

[Blue-eyed]

oh dear!!! i am 42 and the happiest i have ever been, this is due to being single for 5 yrs!!!! 3 children all of whom are dyspraxic! & from 3 different fathers (embarassing but true) I Am extremely dyspraxic & a very frustrating friend/sister/daughter/mother/grandmother/wife/girlfiriend & i don't care anymore! lol x but as a young girl, i drove myself to distraction, because all i heard is "she is lazy" "your useless" "selfish!" "arrogant" oh i can go on & on & on, the best advice i can give young people with Dyspraxia is to learn as much as you can about yourself before entering into a relationship, knowing yourself inturn helps you explain yourself to someone else in simple terms! x if you do nothing else! spend your days researching, going to self help groups, talk talk n talk some more (well type if you find talking difficult!!) , see proffessionals, don't let them bull **** u!!! you have a right to counselling, physio etc don't take no for an answer. Don't feel ashamed to have to take pils (if they help) i will now be on medication for the rest of my life! again I DON'T CARE! they help me, but i wouldn't have done this when i was a young girl & i soooooooo wish i had, so many wasted years, do it now rather than later learn all about dyspraxia and yourself , what you are capable of, what your not capable of, learn to recognise a good day from a bad day , also if you are in a relationship with someone who has Dyspraxia, know that sometimes you may not be helping the person with dyspraxia if you have issues of your own (that are vague) you need to be pretty strong and happy in your own skin to be comfortable around someone sooo dyspraxic, i personally would not be able to help a partner & function myself, it simply would not happen :0( x saying that having dyspraxia has helped me fight for my children to be educated and to know themselves soooo well & be sooo happy in there own skin that they are wonderful human beings!!! & mentally healthy tooooo!! (& they don't get upset with me when i ask them "when where you actually born??) ha ha ha !! (or sorry who are you?) ok so not quite so bad! but out of sight is often out of mind for a dyspraxic!! lol x waffled on long enuf me thinks!!
shey x x

Positive attitude : ) btw I hope I don't mean to hog the attention here the post was origionally started by someone else and I kinda feel I'm hijacking it somewhat (not on purpose) I think this advice can help us all : ) Its good to know that you can work this out in your life. unfortunatley for my gf we didn't find out until later and where spending the whole little time we have adjusting to each others needs. However that being said I think I've had some good advice and the kind of mental attitude that I think is encouraging for us all from everyone who's replied to this blog

[Vonkate]

It took me a while to remember to do it,
My bf never wants me to leave but I explain it to him everytime, which annoys me sometimes, but it does help,
We don't argue as much anymore, we still do sometimes but then every couple argues sometimes. I can't remember the last time we did actuallly, which is a good sign

[Blue-eyed]

It took me a while to remember to do it,
My bf never wants me to leave but I explain it to him everytime, which annoys me sometimes, but it does help,
We don't argue as much anymore, we still do sometimes but then every couple argues sometimes. I can't remember the last time we did actuallly, which is a good sign

Great!

The news I have now Vonkate is that we have worked something out. We've got a new systems where we hang up/ walk away when we get tense or angry adn come back again in 5 mins then we give each toehr turns of roughly 5 mins, so that we don't try and overpower each other by either talking too long or interupting.

Its left us being less defensive, and it gives me less to try and remember. Timing isn't exactly precise because then it becomes a bit pressured so rather than that we're a little loose with timing it.

[Vonkate]

Oh good! I am really glad that you have found a system that works for you! I think that is what makes a relationship work, is just having a system that suits you both!