a bit offended :-(

Discussions relating to jobs and working, including finding work, interviews, the work place etc.

Moderator: Moderator Team

invisible2014
Regular Poster
Posts: 70
Joined: Fri Mar 17, 2017 5:27 pm

a bit offended :-(

Postby invisible2014 » Sat Apr 15, 2017 3:56 pm

Hi so I sent out with a worry college today have gone back doing bank work.i.e covering staff and they were saying how the directors at first didn't want to take me back because of needing to be flexible and hpe I shall have spoken to.then which is what I did

Jim
Super poster
Posts: 643
Joined: Thu Jun 21, 2012 1:01 pm

Re: a bit offended :-(

Postby Jim » Sun Apr 16, 2017 9:12 am

Have you considered having a single thread here where you can off load and rant about your work struggles? It'd certainly make it easier for others to lend moral support and/or advice.

A couple of years back I went through some job turmoil and I put it all in here: viewtopic.php?f=9&t=3194
Jim is back ... Jim is J i m and J i m is Jim.

Confused? I'd be.

invisible2014
Regular Poster
Posts: 70
Joined: Fri Mar 17, 2017 5:27 pm

Re: a bit offended :-(

Postby invisible2014 » Sun Apr 16, 2017 9:36 am

Jim wrote:Have you considered having a single thread here where you can off load and rant about your work struggles? It'd certainly make it easier for others to lend moral support and/or advice.

A couple of years back I went through some job turmoil and I put it all in here: viewtopic.php?f=9&t=3194

Thankyou I will keep it here I.feel so scared not having a proper secure job mu lifes a mess probably csnt even get a good reference because of going sick and this work isn't secure atvall

Jim
Super poster
Posts: 643
Joined: Thu Jun 21, 2012 1:01 pm

Re: a bit offended :-(

Postby Jim » Sun Apr 16, 2017 9:52 am

Have you thought about perhaps going to see a therapist? It seems to me that the work situation could only be part of the situation for you.

Could you have some other emotional troubles perhaps deeper down than you're aware of? You certainly seem to be a dark place right now and you have no confidence. A lack of confidence shows up in all aspects of life.

A few years ago I hit rock bottom emotionally to the stage that I couldn't care less about anything let alone myself.

But you need to recognise that for yourself (if it's true, I don't know you so could be well off point). Then take a decision to change things and make them better for you.

There was a time just a few short years ago that I was staring unemployment squarely in the face without the prospect of having any income support. I was beyond lonely. It was then I began putting myself first and changing elements of my life style.

Since then, I've lifted myself up off the emotional floor.. I've changed my career, I've got myself a mortgage on my first home and I've found love. I've developed some confidence and found happiness.

It's possible. You can do it too.
Jim is back ... Jim is J i m and J i m is Jim.

Confused? I'd be.

invisible2014
Regular Poster
Posts: 70
Joined: Fri Mar 17, 2017 5:27 pm

Re: a bit offended :-(

Postby invisible2014 » Sun Apr 16, 2017 3:23 pm

Thankyou for your reply I'm.so scared off the future,I wish i could just not wake up I hate not having a secure job I feel really bad I hate not working its attrotious and is awful feels horrible

Tom fod
Administrator
Posts: 1798
Joined: Thu May 12, 2011 10:05 pm
Location: SW UK

Re: a bit offended :-(

Postby Tom fod » Sun Apr 16, 2017 4:21 pm

It is a legitimate fear and you're not alone in experiencing these kinds of fears. As Jim suggests I think you really do owe it to yourself to speak to a counsellor or therapist about your worries and concerns so you can build confidence in yourself again and move forwards.

From what I've understood your (former?) employers should be challenged over their failure to meet their obligations as regards their duty of care. However you do have a responsibilility to look after yourself too.

Any employer who is not prepared to listen objectively and understand why you became sick should imho join the Directors and certain staff members of this preschool in the dock. They sound like Sports Direct in their disregard for certain employees.
Tom
Moderator/Administrator

With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)

invisible2014
Regular Poster
Posts: 70
Joined: Fri Mar 17, 2017 5:27 pm

Re: a bit offended :-(

Postby invisible2014 » Sun Apr 16, 2017 4:47 pm

Tom fod wrote:It is a legitimate fear and you're not alone in experiencing these kinds of fears. As Jim suggests I think you really do owe it to yourself to speak to a counsellor or therapist about your worries and concerns so you can build confidence in yourself again and move forwards.

From what I've understood your (former?) employers should be challenged over their failure to meet their obligations as regards their duty of care. However you do have a responsibilility to look after yourself too.

Any employer who is not prepared to listen objectively and understand why you became sick should imho join the Directors and certain staff members of this preschool in the dock. They sound like Sports Direct in their disregard for certain employees.

Thankyou there's such a long waiting list ,I mean I told my line manager I was struggling in lunch club to find out I would have to do this on a daily basis:-(

invisible2014
Regular Poster
Posts: 70
Joined: Fri Mar 17, 2017 5:27 pm

Re: a bit offended :-(

Postby invisible2014 » Mon Apr 17, 2017 7:05 pm

Feeling like I wish I hadn't have quit or gone off sick which I had been brave enough to face it ,I can't cope with no job feel so isolated

Tom fod
Administrator
Posts: 1798
Joined: Thu May 12, 2011 10:05 pm
Location: SW UK

Re: a bit offended :-(

Postby Tom fod » Mon Apr 17, 2017 10:12 pm

Hi there again

I'm worried about you. Is there someone you can talk to about these fears and worries.
Falling ill was not your fault and you need to allow yourself time to recover. Sometimes the crap we have to take outweighs our strength and we have to take a break as our bodies/minds force us to. There is no shame in that but it isn't aways easy to convince ourselves of that fact.
Tom
Moderator/Administrator

With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)

Jim
Super poster
Posts: 643
Joined: Thu Jun 21, 2012 1:01 pm

Re: a bit offended :-(

Postby Jim » Tue Apr 18, 2017 8:28 pm

I concur with Tom. I really hope you go to see your GP and discuss this with them. I sense that there is more to this than a bit of work (or job search) related anxiety.

As Tom says you can't help it if you're genuinely poorly and when that happens you do need to put yourself first. Calling in sick isn't a skive for everybody.. for some poor souls it's a nessacity to restore their own mental balance.

I was written off work for nearly a year for work related stress & anxiety. It did pose a big risk to my employment but it also gave me the time and space to come to terms with the reality of my situation and the opportunity to make big changes to my life.

I know you feel isolated, but you seem to have no support network. And this is why I suggested going to the Gp. They could refer you for some kind of therapy.

Although you're fully aware of how acutely stressed and isolated you feel, I'm not convinced that you've accepted or come to terms with the reality of it. And it's important that you do because it's the first stage of recovery and making those positive changes.
Jim is back ... Jim is J i m and J i m is Jim.

Confused? I'd be.

invisible2014
Regular Poster
Posts: 70
Joined: Fri Mar 17, 2017 5:27 pm

Re: a bit offended :-(

Postby invisible2014 » Sun Apr 23, 2017 5:32 pm

Thankyou everytime,well I was emailing around regarding volunteering and one school replied back asking me to apply for a paid role and send cv,they've now said there really interested and would like to invite me to arrange an interview howger I'm really unsure how to go around the fact that i became sick in my new role and felt I had to resign I'm not very good dave to face and wondered if I should send them an email now to explain and be honest?

Tom fod
Administrator
Posts: 1798
Joined: Thu May 12, 2011 10:05 pm
Location: SW UK

Re: a bit offended :-(

Postby Tom fod » Sun Apr 23, 2017 9:56 pm

Hi
This is good news though I guess you have some worries.? You're in the best place to know if you are ready to start a new job ,though you may want to seek your Drs opinion too and speak to the school about your unfortunate previous experience at the preschool.

It might be an idea to give them a call rather than email. You might want to say that you've been a bit unwell (don't feel you have to give details) and may not be in a position to start immediately.

If you've got any questions please ask.
Tom
Moderator/Administrator

With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)

invisible2014
Regular Poster
Posts: 70
Joined: Fri Mar 17, 2017 5:27 pm

Re: a bit offended :-(

Postby invisible2014 » Mon Apr 24, 2017 4:31 pm

Tom fod wrote:Hi
This is good news though I guess you have some worries.? You're in the best place to know if you are ready to start a new job ,though you may want to seek your Drs opinion too and speak to the school about your unfortunate previous experience at the preschool.

It might be an idea to give them a call rather than email. You might want to say that you've been a bit unwell (don't feel you have to give details) and may not be in a position to start immediately.

If you've got any questions please ask.

Thankyou I'm not sure whether to go ahead and gp for interview,hours are 7.15-9 than 3.15 to 6pm saw my Dr today pretended everything was ok

Tom fod
Administrator
Posts: 1798
Joined: Thu May 12, 2011 10:05 pm
Location: SW UK

Re: a bit offended :-(

Postby Tom fod » Mon Apr 24, 2017 7:39 pm

invisible2014 wrote: Thankyou I'm not sure whether to go ahead and gp for interview,hours are 7.15-9 than 3.15 to 6pm saw my Dr today pretended everything was ok


Aaaarrggghhh I really do despair 8-) Then again, who hasn't pretended things are ok/fine when they really haven't been?

Your Dr isn't there to pass judgement on you for struggling. He or she is there to listen and help so don't be afraid to give the truth of how bad your anxiety is on your worst days and how it is affecting your happiness and holding you back.

As for the job I make it that 22.5 hrs a week (assuming it's Mon-Fri). Its unusual hours and part time but what do you think about it based on the Job Description and what you're looking for?
Last edited by Tom fod on Mon Apr 24, 2017 11:02 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: Because I can/Continuous improvement
Tom
Moderator/Administrator

With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)

invisible2014
Regular Poster
Posts: 70
Joined: Fri Mar 17, 2017 5:27 pm

Re: a bit offended :-(

Postby invisible2014 » Wed Apr 26, 2017 10:22 am

Tom fod wrote:
invisible2014 wrote: Thankyou I'm not sure whether to go ahead and gp for interview,hours are 7.15-9 than 3.15 to 6pm saw my Dr today pretended everything was ok


Aaaarrggghhh I really do despair 8-) Then again, who hasn't pretended things are ok/fine when they really haven't been?

Your Dr isn't there to pass judgement on you for struggling. He or she is there to listen and help so don't be afraid to give the truth of how bad your anxiety is on your worst days and how it is affecting your happiness and holding you back.

As for the job I make it that 22.5 hrs a week (assuming it's Mon-Fri). Its unusual hours and part time but what do you think about it based on the Job Description and what you're looking for?

I dont think its for me at all so ain't gone I prefer preschool children and not working split shits


Return to “Work”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests