Bullying at work

Discussions relating to jobs and working, including finding work, interviews, the work place etc.

Moderator: Moderator Team

Robert Scotland
Getting settled in
Posts: 18
Joined: Mon Mar 09, 2015 2:20 pm

Bullying at work

Post by Robert Scotland »

Does anyone have problems with bullying at work ?
RGabb
Getting settled in
Posts: 38
Joined: Mon Dec 29, 2014 9:58 am

Re: Bullying at work

Post by RGabb »

Not as such but other staff members point out to me that one specific manager is treating me like a a word a cant say on here, as I don't always really pick up on it.
Jake468
Getting settled in
Posts: 34
Joined: Thu Jan 22, 2015 7:29 pm

Re: Bullying at work

Post by Jake468 »

It seems a lot of people have no time for Dyspraxics or anyone who doesn't pick up on something straight away, I myself often experience the obligatory exaggerated <sigh> upon having to ask someone what they said / meant which I'm sure many on here are all too familiar with.
Robert Scotland
Getting settled in
Posts: 18
Joined: Mon Mar 09, 2015 2:20 pm

Re: Bullying at work

Post by Robert Scotland »

Thank you. Some people don't have patience for us
Jim
Super poster
Posts: 710
Joined: Thu Jun 21, 2012 12:01 pm

Re: Bullying at work

Post by Jim »

Jake468 wrote:I myself often experience the obligatory exaggerated <sigh> upon having to ask someone what they said / meant which I'm sure many on here are all too familiar with.
I'm certainly experienced in recieving the esparated look of condescension having taken something slightly to literally.
“When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie
That's amore” :whistle:
Jake468
Getting settled in
Posts: 34
Joined: Thu Jan 22, 2015 7:29 pm

Re: Bullying at work

Post by Jake468 »

Jim wrote:
Jake468 wrote:I myself often experience the obligatory exaggerated <sigh> upon having to ask someone what they said / meant which I'm sure many on here are all too familiar with.
I'm certainly experienced in recieving the esparated look of condescension having taken something slightly to literally.
Occasionally someone will crack a joke which I will take as a completely serious statement, and if the misunderstanding isn't resolved immediately I'll go for years assuming it's true until I eventually bring it up and am swiftly 'corrected' in various levels of exasperation.
morgank82
Regular Poster
Posts: 76
Joined: Tue Apr 28, 2015 9:34 pm

Re: Bullying at work

Post by morgank82 »

Robert Scotland wrote:Does anyone have problems with bullying at work ?
Yes I do alot , I'm on stress disability leave from it that my work benifits support me on.
it took a lot of time and effort , but I landed a good paying job as a deck hand helmsman on the ferry that's right a guy driving a 20 million dollar vessel Under the disorder of dyspraxIA for 5 years but I had issues with the staff management alot. Grrr but never crashed or made a proper mistake to let me go on. They just did not like the way I did things but succeeded in the end of the day.
So they brainwashed me into being my own critic and perfectionist and worrying again, severe social anxiety depression . Life life life Under this unknowing everyday and every sec .
Tom fod
Administrator
Posts: 2947
Joined: Thu May 12, 2011 9:05 pm
Location: SW UK

Re: Bullying at work

Post by Tom fod »

Hi Morgan
have you looked at your employer's policies with regard to bullying and whether you have grounds for making a formal complaint about your treatment?

I can appreciate that there are plenty of reasons why you may feel this route is not somewhere you want to go.
Tom
Moderator/Administrator

With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)
screengreen
Power poster
Posts: 212
Joined: Fri Aug 16, 2013 8:39 pm

Re: Bullying at work

Post by screengreen »

Hi
Yes I experience bullying at work first time left my job but out of the frying pan into the fire! ...now am in a place where I want to go off sick!
morgank82
Regular Poster
Posts: 76
Joined: Tue Apr 28, 2015 9:34 pm

Re: Bullying at work

Post by morgank82 »

Robert Scotland wrote:Does anyone have problems with bullying at work ?
Yes I had multiple situations at work that they belittled me or don't respect me, also they found out I didn't stick my grounds and say anything back, so they took that as me being there week link, mostly the suprivisors, some supervisors were cool enough to go I'm my side but that was slowly changing for I have multiple suprivisors and the top ones pick on the bottom pole ones to go on there side.

There trying to push me out of my job silently cuz they don't like the way I do things but never yet had a accident, I might do things little different but end of the day I succeed.

Manulipidation is the worst , it's been going on for 3 years now and I have been at my job for 5.
I succeeded on controLing am minimizing my effects on my dyspraxia really did a good job at it over the years but now all of it is coming back with trice the force it seems, cuz of the unneeded stress they put on me.
There excuse is they have the right to direct workforce , and yes they do but they need to respect all members also.

I am off work now ,I have depression anxiety cuz it got to bad, I had to be on work disbility cuz my symtoms are fairing up and I'm getting ones that I have not noticed before also.

I can do the job I love my job and I can succeed just like others can in my line of work, it just this high school age attitude towards people under a disibility has to stop.

I even told them I had dyspraxia in my interview and explained it to them , and they hired me now there going back and trying or let me go , also I passed there probations. So really discourages my mind and thoughts and my will now.

Expecially when the management is as trying to fight against me to not a a allow me to get my disibility benifits . I just don't understand it's not like I am trying to cheat the system, I need help and thanks to people at work, what I worked hard at to contain my dyspraxia all those years are now depleting and it's so hard to climb back up,

What about your situation at work bullying ??

Sorry about long story lol
griffaliff
Getting settled in
Posts: 15
Joined: Tue Mar 19, 2013 2:29 pm

Re: Bullying at work

Post by griffaliff »

Hey all,

I am bullied (slightly) at work. I work for a mid-size tree surgery firm in rural Manchester, I've been there about two months now and I can tell that a lot of the other staff there don't like me. They'll all stand around and chat to each other at the yard in the mornings/evenings but I find besides the obligatory 'morning!' and small talk, I am excluded from conversations. Some of them don't even talk to me at all. They'll all go to the pub on Friday's, meet up on the weekend to do foreigner work but I am never invited to anything. I am basically ostracised.

But f*** it, I honestly, truly, don't care. I go there to do my work, go home and get paid at the end of the week. Their opinion of me doesn't concern me one bit.
JamesAnthony91
Regular Poster
Posts: 63
Joined: Sun Jan 03, 2016 4:43 pm

Re: Bullying at work

Post by JamesAnthony91 »

People deal with belittling? Insult them and quit or something. You could try self employment in some area. Bullying isn't something I'd accept whenever dealing with subordinates, and I'm not the type to bully people I work with or over. I'd check to see if I can take a civil case against someone above me in the chain of command if they bully me, or, don't do an adequate enough job in dealing with people trying to bully me, but I don't deal patiently with bullying anyway. I usually have to put people in their places, since I don't like nasty people and don't think they deserve respect(same reason I think Psychopaths should be forcibly sterilized, and why I think that maybe brain implants to rewire their brains should be researched for development as soon as possible.)

I remember doing an 1 year applied laboratory science course years ago at a college of further education(that I quit because, besides some students there sabotaging the practical experiments I was working on and it being a toxic environment, there were no books, just notes we had to take and then study, which annoyed me because I prefer textbooks to supplement my notes) and I did face some bullying. A guy bumped into me, I asked if he did that on purpose, he said yeah, so I got in his face and told him we should get the fight over with, that he can take a dig at me if he needs to prove he's brave, then he backed down saying it was an accident "it was accident alright just an accident!" So, I'm no stranger to any of this, I have dealt with a lot of crap because guys are usually threatened by me and need to test me because they think they need to prove something, so basically it's always me dealing with insecure people like the guy I mentioned trying to insult me. Not only that, but I remember during practical experiments, say I poured something in a beaker or flask for mixing, that would be emptied when I was getting something else I need. So, when people find out they can't DIRECTLY bully me, they have resorted to passive aggressive methods, like doing stuff behind my back. It's hard for bullies to confront someone who'll stand up to them, so, being cowards, they resort to more insidious methods that are more difficult to call out.

I think it goes down to me being an introvert who likes his space and works best when not bothered(I don't do well under supervision, people who know me get that I'm on top of my game when left to do things my own way, and intelligent employers and teachers have understood that about me.) I am friendly and all, but, I don't actively seek to make friends usually, and I try to be as serious as possible(people who know me well say that my personality is basically like that of the most humourless police officers and soldiers when I'm not in the best of moods.) What helped me, is that I learned to be friendlier with people I work with, to make small talk and form work based friendships. If somewhere is ever impossible for me to work at, I just leave. Idk, I guess I tend to keep going forward if a bridge seems burnt. That is fair though, people from Entrepreneurs to those who are employed in well paid jobs, recommend cutting ties with people who make it impossible for you to be productive.

You can't be expected to work efficiently if people are against you, and aren't going to change in that regard. You either have to resolve conflicts, or, if you have tried everything and nothing works, you have to leave that place for your mental health. Depending on where you work, you can go over the head of your employer, and his/her employer, and even his/her employer. You can ask for transfers. There are always options. When all options are exhausted...then you have to find some new work. I wouldn't leave without giving people a "reason you suck" speech, giving the finger, or both. When people don't have it out for me, things tend to go great :D I've experienced positive, and negative, work environments.
scruffy
New member - welcome them!
Posts: 7
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 5:03 pm

Re: Bullying at work

Post by scruffy »

I've been in a few situations where I have been micro-managed to the point I could not think straight which of course increased the chaos factor ie my dyspraxia symptoms. I am not going to do things exactly the right way every time without lots of practice and if someone is standing there telling me I'm doing something wrong midway through whatever I'm doing I lose track of myself. The worst was a clerical job I took in which the boss always found fault with my typing and then accused me of being a poor team player because other people had to proof read my work. Ironically, in the last work types situation I was in, nobody got to go home until everybody's work was proofread and corrected and it wasn't always me needing to make the corrections.
Beneyriey
Getting settled in
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed Jan 13, 2016 9:42 am

Re: Bullying at work

Post by Beneyriey »

Kind of. I've always been quite a vulnerable person, so I know people who've taken advantage of that. I used to be called 'a spastic', because of my co-ordination (like the fact I always wobble over whenever I stand); because of my clumsiness; my bad handwriting and my inability to perform certain tasks easily.

But, having said that, there have always been people who understand me and watch my back.
Tom fod
Administrator
Posts: 2947
Joined: Thu May 12, 2011 9:05 pm
Location: SW UK

Re: Bullying at work

Post by Tom fod »

scruffy wrote:. . . worst was a clerical job I took in which the boss always found fault with my typing and then accused me of being a poor team player because other people had to proof read my work. . . .
This boss sounds like a jerk. Having a colleague proofread something is an example of good team working as they would highlight any errors missed so these could be corrected prior to sending the document out.

Beneyriey:

Completely agree, having friends/colleagues who can and do watch your back is invaluable.

It can be sometimes be difficult to judge whether someone is personally victimising you or whether they are like that to others too (where they think they can get away with it) Either way it it is unacceptable and it erodes self esteem making being assertive even more difficult. Informing someone that what they've just said is wrong and/or hurtful is never easy especially if they've just said something that has taken the wind out of your sails.
Tom
Moderator/Administrator

With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)
Post Reply