How did you feeling when you found out you had dyspraxia?

A place to talk about your experience of living with Dyspraxia

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How did you feeling when you found out you had dyspraxia?

Post by ATJ » Wed Jan 15, 2020 4:24 pm

Hello,I am new to this site and just discovered it yesterday. I am nearly 20 years old and in full time education at university where I was able to get a educational phycologist test and I have just been diagnosed with dyspraxia and mild dyslexia. Before my diagnoses, I never even heard of the dyspraxia disability, so when I found out I was a bit shocked and I didn't know how to take the news. I told my parents and my close friends but they haven't really heard about the disability either. I did some more research about dyspraxia and it does make sense that, this is me, as I always knew there was something wrong with me but I was starting to think that I was just stupid ](*,) or very slow when I wouldn't understand what people have said to me and asking them to repeat them selves like 3 times, until I fully understood what they are trying to say. I use to find it embarrassing aswell as not understanding instructions perfectly the first time. My memory was also shockingly bad to but I didn't know why.

I am just wanting to know how you all felt after finding out you had dyspraxia, because it's been 2 days since I've found out and today I cried sooo much, not because I had it, it's because I've been living with dyspraxia and mild dyslexia for my whole life and was never diagnosed. I went through school life with teachers and my parents seeing me struggle but never got formally tests, which my parents now regret a lot. I went through GCSE's without any help, my hand used to hurt during exams as well, which slowed down my writing a lot.

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Re: How did you feeling when you found out you had dyspraxia?

Post by Tom fod » Wed Jan 15, 2020 10:52 pm

I only found out when I was around 35. I had some assistance at school and I think I was diagnosed as part of statementing process I went through. Nobody, as far as I remember ever discussed it with me and most of my support was around mitigating against my visual impairment,

When I found out it was a relief but I also went through grief, anger, and denial before coming to acceptance /an uneasy truce. This has taken me a while since I first arrived here at this site in 2011 whilst trying to find answers.

I think one of the best tips is to learn to be kinder and more accepting of ourselves. We may feel it but we aren't useless.

With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)

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Re: How did you feeling when you found out you had dyspraxia?

Post by ATJ » Thu Jan 16, 2020 12:36 am

Hello Tom,

Yes I think I’m going through the same stages, even with denial because I believe I can still do loads of tasks but I am trying with acceptance and trying to work with it in a positive way

Thank you

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Re: How did you feeling when you found out you had dyspraxia?

Post by Xenavire » Thu Jan 16, 2020 12:25 pm

I'm afraid I don't actually remember clearly (my memories of my childhood are basically missing in large chunks, I suffered from undiagnosed depression for an unknown time so I've always assumed they were related.)

But from the little I do remember, it was definitely a relief in some ways. I don't know if I went through through anger or denial, but it seems likely that I did.

I think what is important is how I see it now - it is a huge relief to know what is different about me, because I can actually tackle the problems that I face forewarned and forearmed. I can ask for and offer advice in places like this forum, which I wouldn't know to do otherwise. As they say, knowledge is power.

So once the shock has worn off, you can turn things to your advantage (or at least make it less of a detriment.)

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Re: How did you feeling when you found out you had dyspraxia?

Post by pixiewithdocs » Fri Jan 17, 2020 1:45 pm

It can be a long road to accepting your dyspraxia for what it is, it's a process of slowly ascribing difficulties to the dyspraxia and working out what you avoid and what you can't do.
For me it's been a decade of still thinking that I should be able to be the same and do everything as well as everyone else if I try hard enough and make enough plans and should SHOULD be better. That's not the case.
Your dyspraxia is part of you and it's also something separate within you that you have to account for and plan around but the hard part for me is truly accepting that some things are harder and some things I can't do well and I'll always make mistakes on some things because of it. My desk is coffee stained at work and I still take the wrong train sometimes.
React with some self love and remember that it will take time to figure out after so long of not knowing why some things just suck that you are you and you are dyspraxic and that the two are connected. Connected but not intertwined completely - like any SSEN/disability it is you but it doesn't define you and it is so much better knowing.
I also found out at uni and it was shattering but it helped so much.
Visit your uni tutor and GET ACCESS TO LEARNING Tech it is amazing.
Much love and hugs.
Aorta/tattoo the artery/with acute artistry

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Re: How did you feeling when you found out you had dyspraxia?

Post by Willr0490 » Fri Jan 31, 2020 10:45 pm

When my parents initially self-diagnosed me (they watched a TV documentary on Dyspraxia one evening in 1997) and told me they were going to get an assessment for it carried out, I refused to accept it, as I thought the problems I was having at school were simply caused by me not trying hard enough. I reluctantly went through all the stages of assessment prior to getting my statement of special educational needs.

By secondary school however I had accepted my diagnosis and since then living with it has been a lot easier.

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