Dyspraxia and stress - is this normal?

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Ben A
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Dyspraxia and stress - is this normal?

Postby Ben A » Sun Dec 31, 2017 12:32 am

So the last couple of weeks have been very stressful one way or another. Long story short, I had a leg infection so have been signed off work for a couple of weeks from my part-time work, the leg also meant I have been unable to train so that has really jumped my stress levels up quite a lot, it's the busiest month for my small business, and Xmas as well all thrown into the mix.
Exercising is one of the things I do which helps to majorly control my stress levels, call it a crutch if you like, so being unable to do this hasn't helped at all.

This has happened before (different circumstances), and when it does and my stress levels are really high, I become totally out of character. Really tough to write this post, in lieu of the fact I'm concerned no-one else feels similar when stressed, but easier to write than talking to family/friends etc, even though they are aware of the dyspraxia, it is apparently only mild. To be fair, normally, day-to-day, I am a bit clumsy, but the symptoms get worse when I'm stressed amongst other things. Even silly little things like writing this post has taken a lot longer, as can't type well like I normally can.

Basically, I become totally withdrawn, will purposely avoid going out and really don't want to see anybody until it clears, and I will make every excuse and reason not to when I'm like this as I don't want people to see me like it - for all I know, to them I may seem normal, or maybe just a bit on edge, I'm really not sure. I had to go to the post office to send a parcel today, and that felt like a stupidly mammoth task. Kept checking, double-checking everything, keys, wallet etc and that's not me. Had a customer (friend) coming to see me yesterday afternoon, and I cancelled as didn't want them to see me like this. The biggest thing, and this is what really freaks me out, is I get de-personalisation when I feel like this. Also really on edge when this happens too. Met some friends for lunch yesterday, and must have seemed so out of it. Have been invited to two different places tomorrow and just want to say no to both, but know I should really go to both and get myself out there. One is with my best friend in the evening, and she knows I have these episodes sometimes, so is understanding. The other is with her father (they live in separate houses) in the afternoon, who doesn't know about this. We play chess together, so it should be relatively stress-free if I do actually go.

Normally the feelings/de-personalisation etc lasts about a week, until I get control of stress levels again, sometimes more, sometimes less. Very difficult to work when I feel like this, especially as I drive in my part-time job, but I push on and get through it, and don't want my employer to know about my dyspraxia either - also it doesn't affect my ability to drive safely - if anything I drive more slowly than normal!

I guess what I'm asking is does anyone else ever feel like this when they are majorly stressed out? Is this all symptomatic of Dyspraxia, and just that the stress causes different symptoms/issues to 'normal' day-to-day life? I guess I'm concerned something else might be at play here but not sure.

Thanks in advance for any replies.

Tom fod
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Re: Dyspraxia and stress - is this normal?

Postby Tom fod » Sun Dec 31, 2017 1:26 am

Hi again Ben

Yes this is typical and normal for dyspraxia and you'll find plenty of posts from others about how some days/times things/situations that might not ordinarily be at all troublesome can mount up and/or suddenly have us feeling like a deer caught frozen in the headlights of a fast approaching bus. (please excuse the metaphor.)

I find writing easier as It allows me more time to get my words to come out correctly rather than trying to explain verbally and getting it all wrong or fearing that others will just misinterpret me anyway. Dyspraxia and stress go together and very much feed off each other. Your coping strategy is to withdraw but you also feel guilty for doing so (you shouldn't!)
Tom
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With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
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lizzie1991
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Re: Dyspraxia and stress - is this normal?

Postby lizzie1991 » Sun Dec 31, 2017 8:45 pm

I can relate to this as I've had similar problems with this. A few examples I can give are if something has happened to stress me or upset me I can spend days having anxiety attacks. I can also have days (like today) where I have bumped into objects several times over and over again. My room is generally a mess and things still end up getting stomped on repetitively.

I think stress can make things that were already there show up worse and/or again. I'm sure those of us diagnosed with Dyspraxia or undiagnosed dyspraxia know very well that not every day we will be clumsy not every day will you necessarily knock into everything or cause a mess around the house even when tidying up.
Not everyday will we necessarily take everything literally, not every day will we be "interrupting" not every day will we be "repetitive".

For other symptoms such as ones I've noticed for years like my right limbs not in time with the left, stiff reactions in fingers as opposed to left arm, left hand and left leg and foot. I could aim a ball with left left hand and left arm or example but right hand to right foot I may miss kicking loose balance and mostly the ball would not go in direction I intend whereas left isn't brilliant but there is more control there. with this particular one I have mentioned has always been there, I physically cannot move right hands fingers in time with left or fast without it feeling stiff and strainous obviously during basic coordination tests such as physicals it hasn't been picked up. There has been many times I've said to family friends doctors whoever my right hand is slow but it's not been taken notice of and or they have no idea either way.

I will add more later.

nickye
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Re: Dyspraxia and stress - is this normal?

Postby nickye » Mon Jan 08, 2018 1:12 pm

I can so relate to this, I get really anxious. Often I can hide it, but to be honest the last few weeks I have withdrawn into myself a lot and I feel as if I'm out of my body. I have spoken to doctor and counsellor and they reassure me I'm not going mad, it is anxiety which makes you feel like this. I also find I lose confidence.

On the outside I'm quite extravert now but I can get very anxious going into a room full of poeple. Also I worry I will make silly mistakes and get bullied or picked on like I did at school. I know it's irrational in some ways, but in other ways I do think that I do stupid things, and struggle with things like opening tins, parking the car and losing my keys. This then make me feel I'm stupid and yet by avoiding these situations in some ways I'm making it worse.

I feel sometimes that people will say it's just a lack of confidence, but I think I really do struggle with these things. It took me three years to learn to drive and although I can drive OK I still lack confidence sometimes even after 30 years! And yet I'm quite confident outwardly a lot of the time.

Dyspraxia is a hard thing to live with because I think sometimes poeple don't believe I have these struggles when I don't appear to on the outside, and sometimes I can do the things no problem. But I have to concentrate very hard to do things 'normally' and I get exhausted. I am also not very good at multi tasking - I know women are supposed to do this but my hsuband is so much better than me at this!


I hope you are feeling better soon Ben and Lizzie. It is a horrible thing but you're not alone.

Nicky

Davie232
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Re: Dyspraxia and stress - is this normal?

Postby Davie232 » Mon Jan 08, 2018 10:59 pm

Hi, Nick regarding your worries about making silly mistakes.

I don't worry about making mistakes, but as soon as I make them. I want the ground to swallow me up. Because making those silly mistakes make me look like a dafty.

As for stress, I don't suffer from stress that much. I'm more of the paranoid type.

Ben A
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Re: Dyspraxia and stress - is this normal?

Postby Ben A » Mon Jan 08, 2018 11:53 pm

Just an update, normal service is resumed again. Thanks Nicky, for asking, and others for input too.

All in all, I was as good as completely out of it from the 27th December until yesterday morning, so 12 days in all. I tend to find when I have these spells that the first few days I will get gradually worse, then have one or two really bad days (one day when I was trying to force myself to do some business work, I was listening to music then started to cry uncontrollably and have really negative thoughts), then after the really bad days, I start to pull out of it slowly over the following couple of days. Evenings are better than mornings for sure.

Basically I got through it by rescheduling all customer appointments for the business. People were asking what was wrong, and I feigned illness to avoid having to tell them its anxiety, as just feels really silly to have to say that, but when it's bad you really do withdraw, as Nicky says.

I guess the reason I was posting was I wondered if it was or could be related to the dyspraxia as some of the feelings I get are similar to (I think) some of the symptoms of dyspraxia. Things I noticed in the last few days that were very prevalent:- bumping into things, co-ordination was terrible, spatial awareness was really bad too, plus found when people were talking to me, I would hear what they said but wouldn't process it anywhere near as quickly as normal. Also found myself really struggling when driving the bus for instance (not in a dangerous manner I should add!) - just that normally where I would turn in as a car was approaching, I would wait 'just in case' as I perhaps couldn't judge its speed as well as I normally can, or for another example, where I could easily make it between a parked car and a car coming the other way with loads of room, I would wait, again, 'just in case', so I tend to err on the side of caution probably far too much, if anything, rather than take risks. Horrible things, wish they would disappear (the anxiety attacks, not buses!).

BradMac
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Re: Dyspraxia and stress - is this normal?

Postby BradMac » Wed Jan 10, 2018 5:37 pm

I'm pretty much the same way, Ben. My episodes usually last a week to two weeks as well. I usually hide it too by claiming I'm ill and what not. And stress only makes it worse. How long have you been suffering from this?

Ben A
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Re: Dyspraxia and stress - is this normal?

Postby Ben A » Wed Jan 10, 2018 7:30 pm

Yes they're horrible Brad and I'm the same. I've probably had them for a good 10-15 years at least. You?

nickye
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Re: Dyspraxia and stress - is this normal?

Postby nickye » Thu Jan 11, 2018 1:22 pm

Sorry didn't reply before, thanks for update Ben, and pleased you're feeling better. I have been struggling quite a lot at the moment, and not back at work yet. I'm annoyed with myself really, but we have had a difficult few weeks as my uncle died just before Christmas. It has hit me harder than I thought it would.

I keep getting panic attacks. Some days I'm Ok and can drive and go on a train and go shopping, and other days I'm struggling to get out of bed, and I'm worried when I will feel better.

I have been offered CBT and an on line thing via Talking Therapies but I'm not sure I feel up to doing it. Also I sometimes find with CBT that people will say you're thinking in an unhelpful way and I think I'm just telling the truth as I see it. I don't want to sound negative. Does anyone else have experience of CBT?

When I'm well I'm quite sociable but at the moment I'm struggling to go out.

Hopefully this will get better soon and I hope everyone else is doing OK.

Nicky

Tom fod
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Re: Dyspraxia and stress - is this normal?

Postby Tom fod » Fri Jan 12, 2018 12:24 am

nickye wrote:Sorry didn't reply before, thanks for update Ben, and pleased you're feeling better. I have been struggling quite a lot at the moment, and not back at work yet. I'm annoyed with myself really, but we have had a difficult few weeks as my uncle died just before Christmas. It has hit me harder than I thought it would.

I keep getting panic attacks. Some days I'm Ok and can drive and go on a train and go shopping, and other days I'm struggling to get out of bed, and I'm worried when I will feel better.

I have been offered CBT and an on line thing via Talking Therapies but I'm not sure I feel up to doing it. Also I sometimes find with CBT that people will say you're thinking in an unhelpful way and I think I'm just telling the truth as I see it. I don't want to sound negative. Does anyone else have experience of CBT?

When I'm well I'm quite sociable but at the moment I'm struggling to go out.

Hopefully this will get better soon and I hope everyone else is doing OK.

Nicky


I did some CBT sessions back in 2010 iirc. I must admit I was sceptical too but now I look backI think it did help me to be less inclined to beat myself as much up for my failings. I think you have to go into it with an open mind and after a while I think it becomes sort of ingrained and you hopefully don't spiral down as far on bad days and you feel more resilient .

Dark grey skies typical of January don't help either but if you can try to get out in daylight hours (need to do this myself).

I also want to say any thereapist who judges you for 'thinking in an unhelpful way needs have a bit more empathy and concentrate more at facilitating and helping you to see ways to help yourself and think differently.
Tom
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With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
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nickye
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Re: Dyspraxia and stress - is this normal?

Postby nickye » Fri Jan 12, 2018 9:03 am

Thanks very much for the reply Tom. I will try to keep an open mind. It's good to know it was helpful. I went to see the doctor yesterday and she has given me some medication (Sertraline which I had before for anxiety and depression). I feel a bit cross with myself that I can't get myself out of this but I think it's probably for the best to get some help. I am going to do the CBT and keep an open mind. As my chemist said to me (who is lovely) he said you don't have to believe in it 100% and use all the help, even if you get something out of it, it will be worthwhile.

That's my trouble sometimes, I tend to see things and black and white, and want concrete answers, when you can't really. I think I was being a bit negative because of some things I'd read about CBT but I suppose a lot depends on the person you see.

I do find this forum really good and you're always very positive Tom. Thank you - you must spend quite a lot of time and effort on this forum and it is appreciated. It's nice to go somewhere positive and I think this forum is the most encouraging place I've found on the Internet. Sometimes there are fallings out on other forums/Facebook and this is a bit disheartening, but here people really help each other.

I will let you know how it goes.

Thanks again
Nicky

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Re: Dyspraxia and stress - is this normal?

Postby allesandro » Sun Jan 14, 2018 8:47 pm

I think it is normal, at least for me anyway. when I'm majorly stressed out I become extremely reclusive. I don't want anyone to see me so distant and far away looking. It always leads to the inevitable: "what are you thinking about?" "where are you?" "what's wrong?" It's very hard for me to be present


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