I googled Dyspraxia as my boyfriend has it..The google search for relationships / dyspraxia brought me to this forum!! Looks a great place to be with lots of good advice. I am a female in my 30s , the guy is question is a similar age. I have known him for 3 years now and we have always been very close friends ( He is the only person in this very nosey , small area that knows all my secrets and vice versa ! ). 1.5yrs ago we did get into a "more than friends" situation , which ended in much upset as he distanced himself from me and said " He did not want a girlfriend". ( Confusing !)
By this time I had picked up on some quirks and OCD - type behaviours he has , but didnt know he was Dyspraxic , assumed he was simply very OCD ...After a few months we did start seeing each other as mates again and he seemed relieved when I got a serious boyfriend as he knew I wouldnt be making any advances on him............Lots of people do wonder if he is just very shy and reserved or gay............Fast forward to now ...I broke up with the other guy 3 months ago......Started spending lots of time with the Dyspraxic guy again ( We shall call him M) and we soon ended up very intimate again....I thought that this time round I shall keep it casual as Im not long out of a break -up and I didnt want to get to like M too much as i assumed he wants to be single....However he now says that he loves me , has planned spending Christmas together and we seem to be spending most of our weekends indoors enjoying each others company...Im happy with this as he is a great guy , very sweet and intelligent....During a cosy night in recently he has really opened up to me and explained all about the Dyspraxia and how it affects him....So much of his past "odd" behaviour now makes sense !!!
I do need relationship advice so will say more there ,
Whilst first and foremost we're here for people who are dyspraxic/have dyspraxic tendencies, we do try our best to engage with partners; parents friend and relatives where they have questions to at least try to improve understanding.
The way you describe how people are in your area is sadly, probably not all that unusual and people often do make some pretty stupid assumptions based on limited knowledge. And it is maddening!
As neurally diverse types we do think a bit differently and see the world and people around us from a slightly different perspective. In many cases we might tell only a very few people who we feel comfortable with knowing. It's not something that is well understood or easy to explain!
Whilst there are commonalities and shared traits, we're all unique but we want people to see us for who we are and to be able to ‘see beyond the label’. Being a bit clumsy or slow to understand or do certain things can make life difficult as certain people make judgements that are at best unhelpful but often only serve to erode self esteem. We’re perfectly aware we’re a bit different as this will have unhelpfully pointed out by many over the years. Sometimes it’s hard not to care too much about what other people think about us especially when it can sometimes seem like people are watching and judging everything we do.
Tom
Moderator/Administrator
With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)
