I'm new/have some questions

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messylife
New member - welcome them!
Posts: 1
Joined: Sun Sep 28, 2014 8:17 pm

I'm new/have some questions

Post by messylife »

Hi!
I’m a 26 year old published poet and writer. I was diagnosed with dyspraxia at age 8, along with trouble with math. I excelled in english, art (drawing more specifically), but was poor at team sports, yet I was a good runner (long distances) and I do not have rythm problems (can dance, sing on key). Still, I couldn’t play piano (too much hand eye coordiation). I couldn’t kick a ball to save my life (still can’t), never learned how to ride a bike, and would often confuse my left from my right. I learned how to tie my shoes late in the game, but once I got the hang of it (along with left/right), I never really looked back. I lived most of my life knowing that there’s certain things I can’t do - I have trouble following basic instructions or directions (a very simple « it’s the third door on the left will send me into a panic) and get EXTREMELY flustered and nervous when I know someone’s counting on me to do something, but always found jobs and creative outlets. What I want to overcome now is my nervousness - I wish I could be calmer when performing a task because I find that when I am left alone to learn things, I get the hang of them a lot faster than if I am in a group or being watched by someone. I’m terrified of someone thinking I am slow. I don’t think I am, I read more than anyone in my family, follow the news, can write essays with absolute ease and I am quick to think of witty responses and jokes.

My question to you lovely people is - how do you overcome the stress and pressure? Do you also feel that with a little more time/and perhaps alone time, you are capable of doing almost anything, but that with the added pressure of performance, you fall apart? I’ve been known to cry at work a lot because I get frustrated with myself. I avoid jobs where I need to use math, because I know that is the most triggering thing for me, but I also want to be able to pratice and get better on my own.

PS: Dining out with my friends the other night, I found myself extremely nervous about the size of the wine glass. I would sit frozen in fear for 5 minutes trying to convince myself that if I picked up the glass, I wouldn’t drop it and everything would be fine. I eventually got my first sip in and after that, the movement became easy and natural, but I found this to be one of the examples of day to day dyspraxia that really suck. I do not struggle with utencils and I never have, I can eat just fine and have no anxiety about it but holding breakble big things sometimes makes me panicky. Anyone else?
screengreen
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Joined: Fri Aug 16, 2013 8:39 pm

Re: I'm new/have some questions

Post by screengreen »

Hi there a belated welcome I think you my be suffering from a sensory modulation issue, as you say you are good at running you may find a regular run could benefit you, as would any exercise which is hard work, you could also trying carrying a heavy bag, a discreet bag of rice or some drinks in your bag would suffice. These should all have the effect of calming you.
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