A little bit of background - I'm a 20 year old female from the UK, suffering from two anxiety disorders for around 5 years now. These are Social and a Generalised Anxiety Disorders. I was also born at 27 weeks, so I was extremely premature - according to the NHS that could or could not play a factor, but I wanted to add that in just in case it's useful! I'm currently in my first year degree of Zoololgy. My Mum wants me to go for a test, as she stumbled on the dyspraxia foundation site last night and made the sudden connection that it makes sense.
As a kid, I was always clumsy - I'd get my face broken multiple times for failure to catch balls and even now, I still walk into doors! I also tend to use both of my hands for things, I can never decide which hand I want to use. I also have raynaud's syndrome, but I struggle to do things like put my own hair up into a ponytail. However, I can drive (got my license two years ago now) so it doesn't seem I have too many of the motor symptoms. It's when getting into the mental side of things that the dots begin to line up.
My speech and language is absolutely terrible. Typing like this is one thing, as I have plenty of time to think my words (spellcheck also helps!) but when I'm trying to talk to people, it all goes a little pear shaped. I have the tendency to interrupt a lot without meaning too - like I hear others, but then forgetting they're in the middle of a conversation. I am pretty loud when I talk and I struggle to get the correct words out, I repeat myself and stumble a lot, as well as problems with my pronunciation. I have a slight lisp (l's and y's tend to be mixed) and I really struggle with the pronunciation of many words. Reading is..difficult. It's painfully slow, I tend to skim-read (revising is awful) and then if I try and read the words back, I find I struggle in order to read the word and then pronounce it correctly. Mum and Dad are also constantly telling me off for having a high pitched, uncontrolled tone of voice when I'm frustrated or trying to get my point across.
Eye movements are fine - they have to be, in order to be able to drive!
Perception is also an issue - I have absolutely no spacial awareness and often bump into things - mainly people or smashing into doors on my way out, or scraping along walls at work when I think I'm clear of them. Apparently not! I'm always bashing into one thing or another, but that's about it for perception side.
Finally, another big part as to why I want to be tested is all to do with the thought, memory, and emotions. I struggle to revise and learn anything unless it's animated, I'm a very visual learner. I'm always getting distracted and struggle to keep my attention on my work - I'm an absolute dreamer and much rather would be drawing, watching anime or video games! Accuracy is a massive problem, especially on the reading and pronunciation of words, but upon further inspection my spelling isn't that fantastic, either! Emotions are difficult - I struggle at university and work to make friends, I never know what to say and have to physically rehearse orders and phone calls! I've got a habit of avoiding situations that make me uncomfortable and tend to mainly stick to myself, especially as it's difficult to find people with my interests. Parents call me impulsive all the time! And they're always moaning about how I'm erratic and have good and bad days. At work I also struggle as I fail to read people's sign, tone of language, and body language effectively - I always take things too literally and will get upset as I feel it's a attack on myself, though that may be the anxiety talking.
I'm just really unsure to go for a test - parents are encouraging it as it would make a lot of sense, I'm just really worried it's a waste of time for everyone involved. I just don't know if I'm overthinking this and it could be something completely different, you know? I'm super sorry about how long this got and thank you for reading!
