Is my tutor being too hard on me?

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hanalara
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Is my tutor being too hard on me?

Post by hanalara » Sat Nov 28, 2009 11:49 pm

I'm currently studying a degree in Photography, and i was recently diagnosed with Dyspraxia. I've encountered depression and anxiety since i was 15 and currently find social situations extremely difficult and i have to take beta blockers to be calm enough to attend lessons It's now thought Dyspraxia is the reason for the onset of my emotional problems but this is not why i need your help.

I moved to a different university after a bad year at the university where i was living before. Since transferring i have been struggling everywhere. I've found it difficult to produce work because im so paranoid of getting it wrong, ive made few friends, forget work, struggling to get my reading done, and havent handed in a piece of work yet.

Since my diagnosis, which was done by the university, the uni have offered my tutors an 'interim memo', which gives them a basic outline of my needs, until a full assessment of need is carried out. My tutor was being a bit hard on me, understandably at the time because of my absence, and i spoke a lady from dyspraxia skills support who called him to explain things and to ask him to take it a bit easier on me

I've missed a few lessons, partly due to illness(the swine!) and partly due to my insecurities. My anxiety makes me tremble and shake when attention is drawn to me.

I had a meeting with my tutor following this note, and almost everything within the note he said, look you're doing photography, we cant rearrange this just for you, and we cant extend your deadlines because you wont get critiqued etc etc. he said we have to make sufficient compromise. at that moment i agreed, nodded and smiled. but when i left i felt slightly cheated; i need more time to understand briefs(which are tasks organised in convoluted paragraphs) and read and research up on my chosen field, but he just said no. that night i emailed him my project proposal and it wasnt til i went to see him a week later he told me my idea for the hand in was wrong- 4 days before the deadline. i said , would have been nice to know that a week ago, and he said, yeah. I worked so hard that weekend, and stressed my self out so much, i couldnt go on come monday. Im sorry to say.

The next day i was more optimistic as it was my assessment of need and i felt that this would b e the detailed report which makes him understand. I emailed my tutor the night before to say i wouldnt be in as my appointment(hard to get and booked for me) overlapped with his morning session, but will arrive in the afternoon. I had my Assessment of need and ill be getting lots of extra great help and support. When i went to my afternoon session, i apologised again for my non attendance in the morning , and infront of the entire class, he said, 'You shouldnt be missing lessons for things like that, its not acceptable', not ashamed, i said 'i was at my assessment of need...' and he replied... 'i dont care, thats just the way it is you shouldnt be missing lessons'

Now, if you knew me(which you dont so please take my word on this), i go to every lesson i actually can do, and when im not there im at home, in my books, reading about photography, pouring myself into formulating my research and doing as much work as i can, and then i eat then i go to bed and then i get up and the days take the same sort of course.

I feel i'm doing my best, and my mentor feels i am being discriminated against, but am i just over reacting?

Liz944
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Re: Is my tutor being too hard on me?

Post by Liz944 » Sun Nov 29, 2009 8:53 pm

Unfortunately, I found at university they will only accept a certain amount of abscence and can be fairly strict about it, you may get some allowances like extra time in exams and written work or lecture notes up front (often this depends on the tutor and system for distribution of notes at your uni). I found the best way of dealing with tutors is tell them the issue first and if then not playing ball go to the disability unit and get them to deal with it. After the first couple of run ins they tend to get the message that you will go to someone higher if they are not being helpful. The other thing is to get work in on the deadlines if there is no way of doing it warn the tutor at the start of any issues and if things get worse differ the unit. But be careful not to differ to much work (4+ modules) as you then get a build up of work (this can sometimes make things worse)and could get kicked off the course.

The only advice I can offer with regard to the reading of material is concentrate on reading the work you need to get the coursework complete at my uni they said we were supposed to be doing 180hrs extra reading per module (with 6 modules a year). Concentrate on getting the coursework done rather than doing extra reading as this will contribute to your degree classification.

Some tutors can be a pain in the backside.... If the tutor is a personal tutor ask to be changed to someone you feel comfortable with. If he/she is taking lectures chose modules he/she will not be taking...
Drama is life with the dull bits cut out...

NobodyElseWill
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Re: Is my tutor being too hard on me?

Post by NobodyElseWill » Fri Jul 23, 2010 6:48 pm

my advice keep your absent record down or only be absent for health related things like if you have a flu or you've had an accident (got runover) somethings you can't help. Also i always try to think one step ahead and it works for example plan ahead, use your diary, get your bag read the night before and shower in the evening to save time and stress in the morning. I also make sure I have my outfit ready, even though there are some days where i misplace where i have put stuff.
Also make great friends with the coffee machine in your flat or the tea girls in starbucks. I also have pictures of sucessful women/men on my work desk and it always makes a difference.
I always try to imagine when I'm studying myself a social worker working in London and it always inspires me to work hard. Then i think of the people who haven't got that option. I think i can do it! I also find watching my favourite films like my sister's keeper, step up and save the last dance as reminder to work hard.
CertHE (Open) Health and Social Care (2009)
Access to Health and Social Care (2009)
KYJ113 Foundations for Social Work Practice (Pending)

Osymandus
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Re: Is my tutor being too hard on me?

Post by Osymandus » Sun Jul 25, 2010 9:35 am

I really would keep up with the Disbailitys unit as well . If this was taking place in teh workplace your tutor would be facing well founded charges of harassment and not making reasonable adjustment . What he did in-front of teh rest of teh class is humiliation and you have witnesses to this affect .

Though I'm not saying go all militant as i have many friends who are lecturers and i know teh job can be bad at times .

Try and keep notes of when this occurred and speak to the DU, your disability is made worse by stress as well so if you feel its getting on top also speak a counciller , sadly a disadvanatge of Dyspraxia is a higher occurrence of depression (i know i have it myself :( )

NobodyElseWill
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Re: Is my tutor being too hard on me?

Post by NobodyElseWill » Sun Jul 25, 2010 4:37 pm

The disability should definitely help even though I found them quite patronising when i was at college a few years ago before the access course.
CertHE (Open) Health and Social Care (2009)
Access to Health and Social Care (2009)
KYJ113 Foundations for Social Work Practice (Pending)

mike0199
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Re: Is my tutor being too hard on me?

Post by mike0199 » Sun Mar 06, 2016 12:12 pm

hanalara wrote:I'm currently studying a degree in Photography, and i was recently diagnosed with Dyspraxia. I've encountered depression and anxiety since i was 15 and currently find social situations extremely difficult and i have to take beta blockers to be calm enough to attend lessons It's now thought Dyspraxia is the reason for the onset of my emotional problems but this is not why i need your help.

I moved to a different university after a bad year at the university where i was living before. Since transferring i have been struggling everywhere. I've found it difficult to produce work because im so paranoid of getting it wrong, ive made few friends, forget work, struggling to get my reading done, and havent handed in a piece of work yet.

Since my diagnosis, which was done by the university, the uni have offered my tutors an 'interim memo', which gives them a basic outline of my needs, until a full assessment of need is carried out. My tutor was being a bit hard on me, understandably at the time because of my absence, and i spoke a lady from dyspraxia skills support who called him to explain things and to ask him to take it a bit easier on me

I've missed a few lessons, partly due to illness(the swine!) and partly due to my insecurities. My anxiety makes me tremble and shake when attention is drawn to me.

I had a meeting with my tutor following this note, and almost everything within the note he said, look you're doing photography, we cant rearrange this just for you, and we cant extend your deadlines because you wont get critiqued etc etc. he said we have to make sufficient compromise. at that moment i agreed, nodded and smiled. but when i left i felt slightly cheated; i need more time to understand briefs(which are tasks organised in convoluted paragraphs) and read and research up on my chosen field, but he just said no. that night i emailed him my project proposal and it wasnt til i went to see him a week later he told me my idea for the hand in was wrong- 4 days before the deadline. i said , would have been nice to know that a week ago, and he said, yeah. I worked so hard that weekend, and stressed my self out so much, i couldnt go on come monday. Im sorry to say.

The next day i was more optimistic as it was my assessment of need and i felt that this would b e the detailed report which makes him understand. I emailed my tutor the night before to say i wouldnt be in as my appointment(hard to get and booked for me) overlapped with his morning session, but will arrive in the afternoon. I had my Assessment of need and ill be getting lots of extra great help and support. When i went to my afternoon session, i apologised again for my non attendance in the morning , and infront of the entire class, he said, 'You shouldnt be missing lessons for things like that, its not acceptable', not ashamed, i said 'i was at my assessment of need...' and he replied... 'i dont care, thats just the way it is you shouldnt be missing lessons'

Now, if you knew me(which you dont so please take my word on this), i go to every lesson i actually can do, and when im not there im at home, in my books, reading about photography, pouring myself into formulating my research and doing as much work as i can, and then i eat then i go to bed and then i get up and the days take the same sort of course.

I feel i'm doing my best, and my mentor feels i am being discriminated against, but am i just over reacting?
No you are correct, thanks for sharing your story
Last edited by Tom fod on Sun Mar 06, 2016 9:43 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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