A different kind of love?

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shadowgirl021
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A different kind of love?

Post by shadowgirl021 » Fri Apr 25, 2014 6:33 pm

I was wondering what love actually means to people, I know that sounds strange but am currently in a relationship which stemmed from a wonderful friendship.

He is very traditional so wants children with me and marriage and to move in, in the future. Though I said I do not want children and marriage he said it's fine even though I know that's what he wants.

Here is what I am very worried about. I know love isn't a fairy tale, my head is fully screwed on when it comes to that. I really like him, I do. I care about him, I think about him every day, smile and/or laugh whenever someone says his name and have blushed on several occasions when someone mentions his name. Once my heart beat faster when a work colleague mentioned his name (turned out, she said a different name). He is even breaking down my barriers I have about physical contact. But....

The quirks which I did not know about him before are annoying me, they are not enduring. I see us taking trips together but not him moving in together, he wants me to do things that I won't do but if I ask him to do something he will do it, which is why he called me selfish before and though it hurt when he said it, I would have to agree. He thinks we should spend every day together as well, if we are not together then we should at least contact each other by phone, email. I was so happy when I met him because he was quiet like me and we both opened up with each other.... two quiet people. But he wants to spend majority of his time with me, which I should find sweet but I don't

I know love is different for different people, I guess I am scared, I have never felt like this before. He has gone further then other males so I know I really care about him (I mean physical contact) but from everything I have read or seen I should be in this state of euphoria and find him irresistible. I don't know...... I think I am being too hard on my self.

Has anyone ever felt love? and what does it feel like?

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pouvik
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Re: A different kind of love?

Post by pouvik » Fri Apr 25, 2014 11:42 pm

love is a bitch ... it can come in many forms ... to anyone ... everything you said sounds alot like me and one of my ex's, difference I see is she has a kid from another relationship, your "friend" sounds alot like me and you her, we ended up moving in together and destroyed us ... but we are still friends and her new boyfriend is a great guy ... from my own experience, you need to tell your "friend" and make him realize, he will be hoping that you will end up seeing his view and unless a compromise on both sides is made then issues will arise ... never say never and know one knows what the future holds ... i go sleep now

shadowgirl021
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Re: A different kind of love?

Post by shadowgirl021 » Sat Apr 26, 2014 6:24 pm

Thank you for replying :)

That is good that you are still friends with your ex, I strongly believe that can happen and not all relationships end badly even though you were in a bad situation with moving in together.

I know he will agree with me when I say what I want but ultimately he will further down the line try to change my mind. before I met him, I hated the idea of physical contact, I would let friends and family hug me but I would not actively touch anyone but he's changing that, though it's just with him but it could go on to expand. Also he gave me the self confidence to try to go to university, an idea I previously dismissed before hand.

Those both are good, they are but both times he changed my mind, so I know further down the line he will want to try change my mind again. Though I don't know why I am thinking about this now. I am struggling to work out if I am in love first of all :blush: he apparently does me so I do not know

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pouvik
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Re: A different kind of love?

Post by pouvik » Sun Apr 27, 2014 6:34 am

no the breakup with my ex was bad ... as always when she and I broke up I started drinkin heavier than usual and tried other things, it was actually an intervention from my MP that stopped me, he saw a post on twitter was worried, and phoned me up (we are on opposite sides of politics and debate a lot but he had my number for something else), spoke to me for 2 hours and then requested to meet me at a neutral location, he came and we talked and it helped and I cut my drinking back to normal. Ironically my MP was on a alcohol ban at the time and not allowed in pubs etc for punching another MP in one of the westminster bars.

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