Dyspraxia and sex - awkward

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johndom
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Dyspraxia and sex - awkward

Postby johndom » Tue Sep 03, 2013 2:03 pm

hello am just intrested in seeing if any of my fellow dyspraxic people have same problem as i do during sex am a male 22 5ft8 a weird body mixing of fat and muscle haha i find it hard to actually go faster am ok with slow controlled thusting/ humping but if she wants it fast its a disaster i hault and stop continusly not within my control i dont get complaints but its annoying that mixed with my anxeity causing my member to go floppy just seeing if anyone can relate and if so any solotions apologise for some mispelt words lol

Tom fod
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Re: dyspraxia and sex Awkward

Postby Tom fod » Tue Sep 03, 2013 9:45 pm

I think it depends very much on communication between the two of you. Not necessarily an easy feat for many of us dyspraxic guys and many of us may not have been as lucky with the opposite sex. Take comfort that you are getting some practice but be discreet about it!

In my own experience (and probably others' too) fears about what is expected or how to initiate if one is actually aware that she is actually a potential partner holds a lot of us back!

If there are no complaints and you are getting asked for repeat performances I think you can afford to be a bit more confident. At the very least you are responding to and thinking about what she wants.
Tom
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With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
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johndom
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Re: dyspraxia and sex Awkward lol

Postby johndom » Tue Sep 03, 2013 11:02 pm

I refer to she as girls av been with am curruntly single cause like you said I get scared when I get too close all my relationships have been disasters but am getting confident in some areas of life but sex isn't one of them am sort of good at fore play but yeah just certain things is hard during the intimacy I lost my virginity quite late I was 21 I was scared before then to even attempt to chat up a girl owell hope it solves its self

missshanha
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Re: dyspraxia and sex Awkward lol

Postby missshanha » Sun Oct 20, 2013 8:21 pm

I agree! I find doing any type of movement quickly and repetitively is difficult. .especially in the bed room

johndom
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Re: dyspraxia and sex Awkward lol

Postby johndom » Sun Oct 20, 2013 8:56 pm

Yeah its annoying as I cant finish cause am to used to going fast with my hand so when I cant go that fast in the bedroom it proves problem suppose il just have to learn to go slower when masterbating haha

SerieA
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Re: dyspraxia and sex Awkward lol

Postby SerieA » Tue Oct 22, 2013 3:52 pm

Hi I'm new to this site, I've joined looking to get some advice really. I've recently (3 months) started dating a guy who is dyspraxic, he's 44 and told me almost immediately about his condition, myself being a student nurse immediately did a bit of research and I have to say was not too worried and didn't want it to be an issue, however a few months in we have started being intimate and there clearly is a serious problem. He is clearly very inexperienced and has no idea about sexual intimacy or the act itself, we've spoken about it and I've tried to reassure him that I am willing to go on this journey with him but he's worrying that I'll finish our relationship if he tries again to have sex..has anyone got any advice on what I can do to help him gain some confidence and knowledge, or what he can do to help himself? Don't wanna be crude but I'm desperate to be physically intimate with him as I really like him and care for him and want our relationship to move on albeit at his pace of course. Thanks. 8-[

johndom
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Re: dyspraxia and sex Awkward lol

Postby johndom » Tue Oct 22, 2013 5:36 pm

Us dysperaxics have a habit of waiting for the green light for mostly everything just tell him we can be intimate infact id love to have sex with you more often don't be scared to start the process he should eventually be come more confident am not confident but I stil have sex just takes getting used to we find it hard with fast ir controlled movement so practice some positions that require minimum effort

SerieA
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Re: dyspraxia and sex Awkward lol

Postby SerieA » Tue Oct 22, 2013 6:38 pm

Thanks for the reply, any advice is greatly received. :)

Tom fod
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Re: dyspraxia and sex Awkward lol

Postby Tom fod » Tue Oct 22, 2013 7:52 pm

He's a lucky guy!

I'd go with what Johndom suggests in that you need to make sure he knows when he has the green light. As an inexperienced guy myself, I think part of it is he most probably believes there is an expectation that he has to know what he is doing to please you. But he is at the same terrified about his lack of experience and that he may do something wrong/hurt you and that you will soon lose patience and find a new man

Has he spoken about what has gone wrong in the past? I would guess there is a fear of being judged and just as bad a fear of the feeling he might be.

Trying to think of things I'd want my future girlfriend to do to help build my confidence and ideas of post its notes detailing things you'd like him to do.

Creating a sort of user manual for yourself?

mutual self play sessions to build up to intercourse?

Erotic not pornographic books/films - not the unrealistic stuff he might have seen online.

I would say humour but there is a danger that we dyspraxic guys can take stuff too literally at times.

All the best and I hope it works out for you both.
Tom
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With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)

TCE
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Re: dyspraxia and sex Awkward lol

Postby TCE » Sat Nov 02, 2013 1:17 pm

Coming from a somewhat experienced guy in the sex department, I agree that we dyspraxics need the green light for the okay. I lost my virginity at 16, and many of my relationships are from girls taking an interest in me first. I'm pretty shy in the outside world, I would never chat up a woman at a night club or anywhere for that matter. The relationships I've had are from girls coming on to me, that's the green light for me and that's all I need. Because I was having sex so often in my teenage years, with many different girls, I got used to what girls liked and disliked. So I eventually got pretty damn good at sex and never had complaints, and most even complimented that they enjoyed it. I'm 25 now, and I've been in love 5 times, and have had sex with about 30 different girls, that's not much I know especially considering all my mates have a much higher number. But I'm more about relationships now than I was in my teenage years. More to the point, just go slow with him, and he'll eventually get the swing of things, and of what you like and dislike.

SerieA
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Re: dyspraxia and sex Awkward lol

Postby SerieA » Sun Nov 03, 2013 3:28 am

Thanks for the advice guys....a few weeks on and I'm pleased to say we have moved on a little further with a little persuasion, each time being that little better... ;) I've reassured him that I'm willing to be patient and help him build his confidence and have invested in a couple of books for us both (his homework he calls it..lol). Practice makes perfect as they say. :banana: Cheers.x

hardygaza
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Re: Dyspraxia and sex - awkward

Postby hardygaza » Mon Aug 15, 2016 2:06 am

hi all i have dyspraxia and autism i cant spell write talk good doing sex i have no rhythm
or coordination i stop an start all the time i cant kiss my wife or touch her write is this all a part of it im on testosterone injections testicles dont work i have a micro penis condition

puberty not until 18 is anone else like me pl help

Tom fod
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Re: Dyspraxia and sex - awkward

Postby Tom fod » Tue Aug 16, 2016 10:16 pm

Hi and welcome
I'm not sure many people would have the courage to be as open and honest about personal difficulties of this nature. To my knowledge, you're the first to openly disclose so I have to say I've no idea how prevalent your condition is within the general population and various sub-groups.

Have you discussed this and treatment options with your wife and/or Doctors/staff who dispense your testosterone?

This link may also be useful: https://www.lifestyle.com.au/tv/embarra ... own-under/

It's possible that if anyone has related or similar experiences, they might prefer/choose to communicate using this site's Private Messaging functions. Please respect the fact that people might not feel comfortable discussing conditions of this nature.

Please can anyone immediately contact the moderator team should they receive anything that is in any way abusive or upsetting so that we can respond accordingly.
Tom
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With a foot full of bullets I tried to run faster but I just hobbled on to the next disaster.
(from Peter and the Test Tube Babies, Foot Full of Bullets)


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