Really dislike touching

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mamthy
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Really dislike touching

Post by mamthy » Sun May 13, 2012 7:37 pm

Hello. I just wondered if anyone else has this intense dislike for touching people? I have always hated it with friends and family members. Nobody else seems to understand it when I explain and just think i'm strange. Now, I am 21 and have just got my first boyfriend, I'm really worried about this whole intimacy thing as it doesn't come naturally to me at all. He knows, as I have discussed it with him, but does anyone know how I could overcome it or make it slightly bearable and introduce myself slowly? Thank you! :)

Creative
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Re: Really dislike touching

Post by Creative » Mon May 14, 2012 4:53 pm

You are not alone. You sound very similar to me. I dislike paople touching me and touching other people. It's the feeling of skin. I can't bear at. I worry about how i would manage if i had a boyfriend.

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Tim G
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Re: Really dislike touching

Post by Tim G » Wed May 16, 2012 7:35 pm

I think firstly you should ensure that he understands the situation and that he dosent try to rush or do somthing which is too much. That's easer said then done if you dont say so really its down to comuaction and telling him if its too much for you.

You said about how you should try it first and my advice would be to take thing verry slowley and at a pace you feel comfatable with.
The real Mr Potato Head

Captain_Ludd
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Re: Really dislike touching

Post by Captain_Ludd » Wed Jun 06, 2012 10:07 am

Hi Mamthy,

Very glad you raised this issue thought it might just be me but didn’t have the guts to ask.
Yup I’m very similar I’m really not a touchy feely person at all and I have serious personal space issues.
In my experience it can make the intimacy thing a challenge for me I have to really trust the other person totally for it to be what’s the word ... a comfortable? enjoyable? experience (does that make any sense ? it just seems to un "blokey" to say that but there you go ).
Up until I started learning about the neurological effects of autistic spectrum disorders like dyspraxia I thought it was just me so I never said anything but apparently we are prone to being either very overly or underlay tactile people.
Because of this I couldn’t really say anything to my ex and it did put quite a lot of pressure on thing so she thought I wasn’t that interested in her the opposite was actually true, we (I) got over it eventually but it was a slow process totally about trust.
So as people have already said the best thing to do is tell him the truth if he really likes you then he'll understand and take things at our pace.
Thanks for bring that up , id never had the guts to ask that, as a bloke I always thought it was so un manly :).

Captain_Ludd
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Re: Really dislike touching

Post by Captain_Ludd » Wed Jun 06, 2012 10:10 am

he'll understand and take things at our pace
Sorry that should have said your not our bad place to make a typo :blush: .

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