Finding love

[Tom fod]

I've found this massively difficult there seems to be so much pressure at times probably quite a bit of it from myself so really don't need it from others too.

Have tried probably half a dozen internet dating sites written good profiles and even met a few people but as yet I have always failed to get a second date so worry that I must be sending out signals that I'm desperate and I guess in a way I'm guilty as charged but face it I am a bloke 8-)

Loads of stuff worries me guess it's the rubbish self esteem because of stuff I can't do and trying to understand unwritten societal rules which not everyone believes in anyway.

Anyway had a bit of a rant and wondered what other people on here thought?

Tom

[hanna]

I think you shouldn't bother with internet dating because to me it seems weird and people are normally on it because they cant find a date in real life.i think before you start looking for love you should work on your confidence in yourself and dont try too hard like i bet that as soon as you stop looking someone will come along..good luck

[Tom fod]

good advice but not exactly that practical when you have dyspraxic issues. I do try though as I'm a determined type and just can't sit idly by But we're all affected especially when things get on top of us.

[hanna]

yah ture spose you cant just do nothing...i think if you have low self esteem the only thing you can do is fake confidence ..i know its a clique but the fake it to make it thing really dose seem to work...the biggest turn off in a fella is no confidence...if i was going to give one piece of advice to getting a girl it would be to act like you dont give a **** weather they like you or not...i know for a fact it works with me and all of my friends..i think every girl to be honest..i dont mean treat them badly but just act like your completely indifferent.(this advice goes the start of a relationship obviously when it becomes more serious you need to show you care) try it!!! i swear it works on nearly all girls...

[Tom fod]

Thanks Hanna I shall try. Good day today as had really nice walk through woods around where I live and had a jolly good laugh at Benidorm too.

I think it can be an effect of our dyspraxic ways in that we're often very caring people and aren't always good at being multi faceted? or being able to change ourselves unless it's from one extreme to another which isn't always going to suit the situation required. It sadly does seem that showing you care in an uncaring world is often seen as a weakness but will try and enjoy myself and appear less ready to 'bend over backwards' for others. I'll stop here and restrain myself as don't know my audience here well enough to let fly with my dark sense of humour

[lauraECFan]

I find its best that if you meet a girl you would like more than friendship with then rather than rushing into a date get to know her chances are if she is a genuine person when you do ask her on a date it could end up turning into love

Good luck in finding love