Getting into a relationship (both friendhip and romantic...)

[Grackle]

It took us almost 3 hours each way to go see it but it was worth our while. It's playing in New York City right now (if you're planning a short trip )

[mattyjacko]

Yeah the label thing is annoying, cant people just judge you on your personality and not whether your appearance and behaviour fits the norm. I am a skinny emo dyspraxic so like you not the easiest of things especially in school. School was a nightmare because i just didn't fit in. I was messy, clumbsy, weak, small, skinny, slow and much more emotional and sensitive then a guy 'is supposed to be'. It is infuriating how people have expectations about what a certain person is supposed to be. Like men are supposed to be big and strong, do competitive tough sports and drink beer, or women are supposed to be sweet and kind and feminine, slim and friendly. even within a label which is considered weird you can be considered normal and withoin a label that is considered normal you can be considered weird. What i mean by this is for example the goth label. goth is considered strange by some but people within the goth label can be considered normal by conforming to the 'rules' of being a goth, so people are accepting of labels that they deem unusual if the person fits the exact form of the label.

I feel that now i am 23 and in my final year of uni i can completely be myself and am very much liked for being myself so thats what i say to everyone. Keep being exactly who you are and who you want to be and you will make real friends. Fakers don't make real friends or if they do it cant be the most comfortable way to live.

I find it really hard to be friends with the mainstream sort of person so I have joined societies that have very alternative types. So if you feel you dont make friends because the people around you think you are weird, just do as i do and find other weird people. I dont try to be normal and go to normal clubs and try to make friends with normal people (although a lot of my friends are normal) I accept that i like different things to the mainstream and i go to alternative clubs and join societies where i know for example that the guys are beta males and not macho and competitive.

Making friends is all about not forcing anything, being natural and authentic and finding people which you have things in common with. specific sports groups, music genre societies and specific interest societies (like wine, anime or film) are very good for making friends. I am a competitive archer and i have loads of friends at archery clubs boithat uni and in outer city clubs. Being friendly and open is also a good way of getting friends and making people warm up to you. if you are enclosed and hard to talk to it will be difficult. I used to fin it so hard to talk to people but now i have a lot of confidence and i have gone the opposite extreme and talk too much. AS shows by this huge post lol.