Missing him very much

[Little Miss Anxious]

He said he misses me like crazy recently on the phone and that if i need help with my studies or financially or if I feel in danger to contact him straight away and that I will get down to see him and that the distance isn't easy for him either. H e has said alot of times and a few days ago that I am the one for me but because of of his dark previoust scary and needyness experiences he has decided that he hates the world and all the people except for his group, me, my family and his family. He said he whishes he was an animal instead of a human and told me to trust him that people can't be trusted and that he always wants mw safe and happy and to be treated respectively and for me to look after myself. It concerns him when I don't look after myself. I'm questioning whether I'm dyspraxic or not and all I got was that I am 2 or 3 years behind in develoopement and that I have difficulty with performing or with my motor schools and I have bought a book on Dyspraxia and I could identify alot of my previous symptoms as a child and some of my symptoms as an adult and my mum read it and said judging from this book you are dyspraxic and I could walk when I was 2 and my mother had to teach me how to power walk properly when I was a teen and my running isn't as good as everyone elses and I had lack of oxygen to the brain when I was a baby and my mum said that a part of my brain is damaged and I think it may be mostly my motor side. I have learning disability but I have great inteligence, am creative, gentle, determined, understanding and wanting to be like everyone else and I have great difficulty in understanding maps and directing people so how can it just be a problem with my learning and mentality because I should be able to do it now because I am 18 even though I'm twenty one really because 18 year olds would good with their directions unless they have problems in direction which would make them dyspraxic because it is listed as one of the basics is it not? I am convinced that I'm dyspraxic because it's the only alternative to why my learning patterns are different and why I struggle in dexterity and why I yet still remain very inteligent and my brain is stronger than any other part of me so it would make sense to me if I was diagnosed with Dyspraxia and not a learning disability because I think there are different kinds of learning difficulties and my OT reccons I have mild Dyspraxia. People wonder why I am so confused. WB